If someone says these 8 phrases about your relationship, they’re waiting for it to fail

There’s a fine line between being concerned about someone’s relationship and secretly hoping it will fail.

This difference is all about intent. Hoping for a relationship to fail is all about wanting to see it crumble, often due to envy or bitterness.

Having concerns, however, is about wanting the best for the people involved, even when this might mean facing tough truths.

In my years as a relationship expert and founder of the Love Connection Blog, I’ve learned that certain phrases can reveal a lot about someone’s intentions.

Here are eight phrases that might signal someone’s waiting for your relationship to fail. If you hear these, take note, because they could be revealing more than they intend. Let’s dive in.

1) “I’m just saying…”

In my years as a relationship expert, I’ve heard this phrase more times than I can count.

“I’m just saying…” is often a preface to a prediction of doom, a thinly veiled expression of doubt about your relationship’s longevity.

It’s a subtle way of implying that they’re merely stating facts, not expressing an opinion. But let’s be clear, it’s rarely as innocent as it sounds.

When someone uses this phrase, they’re usually hinting at their belief that your relationship is on shaky ground. And often, they’re not just predicting the future; they’re hoping for it.

This phrase, though seemingly harmless, can carry a weight of negativity and doubt. So, the next time you hear “I’m just saying…”, pay attention to the context and the intent behind it. You might just uncover some hidden hopes for your relationship’s failure.

2) “Are you sure about this?”

Another phrase that I’ve frequently encountered in my career as a relationship counsellor is “Are you sure about this?”

On the surface, it seems like a genuine expression of concern. But when it’s repeated often, and especially without any concrete reason, it can reflect a deeper sentiment.

This phrase subtly implies that they believe you’re making a mistake. That they think your relationship is destined for disaster, and they’re just waiting for the inevitable downfall.

As Bret Harte once said, “The only sure thing about luck is that it will change.” In relationships, ups and downs are normal. But having someone constantly question your choices can create unnecessary doubts and tension.

So, if you often hear “Are you sure about this?” from someone about your relationship, take a step back and consider where their comments are coming from. Are they genuinely concerned or do they have ulterior motives?

3) “It’s not like it’s going to last forever”

This one stings a little, doesn’t it? When someone says “It’s not like it’s going to last forever…”, they’re essentially predicting the end of your relationship.

I’ve seen this phrase cause a lot of emotional turmoil in my clients. It not only undermines the commitment between partners, but it also plants seeds of doubt and insecurity.

In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I talk about the importance of positivity and support from your social circles.

When someone is constantly anticipating the end of your relationship, it can certainly impact your emotional well-being and even your relationship dynamics.

Every relationship has its own rhythm and trajectory. Don’t let anyone else’s negative predictions cloud your judgment or affect your bond.

4) “You two are just too perfect”

This one may seem counterintuitive, but hear me out. Hearing “You two are just too perfect…” might initially come across as a compliment, but it can sometimes be a veiled expression of skepticism.

Perfection is an illusion, and no relationship is without its ups and downs. When someone says your relationship is “too perfect,” they might be subtly implying that it’s too good to be true, and they’re waiting for the bubble to burst.

In my experience, this phrase often comes from a place of envy or disbelief. They may not be able to comprehend how your relationship works so well, so they assume that it’s only a matter of time before things fall apart.

Remember, your relationship doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but you and your partner. Don’t let anyone else’s skepticism create self-doubt or uncertainty in your bond.

5) “Don’t you think you’re settling?”

This phrase is a classic, and one that’s particularly close to my heart.

When someone asks, “Don’t you think you’re settling?”, they are indirectly suggesting that your partner isn’t good enough for you, and that your relationship is doomed to fail.

In my early twenties, I heard this phrase a lot about my then-boyfriend, now-husband. It was difficult not to let it affect me, but I learned over time that people’s opinions often reflect their own insecurities more than they do any objective reality.

When someone suggests you’re “settling,” they might actually be projecting their own fears and insecurities onto your relationship. Or worse, they could be waiting for your relationship to fail to validate their own beliefs.

Only you know what’s best for you. Trust your judgment and don’t let others’ opinions sway your decisions about your relationship.

6) “You can do better…”

This is a raw and honest one, isn’t it? When someone tells you, “You can do better…”, they’re implying that your partner isn’t worthy of you and that your relationship is likely to fail.

This phrase can be painful to hear. It’s a direct attack on your partner and by extension, your judgement. It’s as if they’re waiting for you to realise this supposed ‘truth’, break up, and validate their prediction.

It’s important to remember that you are the only one who truly knows your relationship and what it means to you. Don’t let anyone else’s opinion of your partner or your relationship cloud your judgement.

Your relationship’s success isn’t determined by what others think of your partner, but by the love, respect, and commitment you both share.

7) “I just don’t see you two together”

This phrase is another one that’s hard to ignore. When someone says, “I just don’t see you two together…”, they’re voicing their doubts about your relationship’s future loud and clear.

I remember hearing this from a friend when I first started dating my husband. It was hard to hear, but I realized that people’s visions are often limited by their own experiences and perspectives.

As the brilliant Maya Angelou once said, “You alone are enough. You have nothing to prove to anybody.”

When someone can’t envision your relationship, it’s more about their lack of imagination than it is about the viability of your partnership.

You see, it’s your relationship, your love story. Don’t let anyone else’s narrow perspective cloud your own.

8) “Are you really happy?”

This phrase can be a real gut-punch. Hearing “Are you really happy?” from someone can sow seeds of doubt in even the most secure relationships.

It’s raw and it’s honest, and it can make you question your own feelings. But here’s the thing – it’s often not about your happiness at all. It’s about the person asking the question waiting for your relationship to fail.

In my experience, this question usually comes from people who can’t fathom why your relationship works, or perhaps those who wish they were in your shoes.

Remember, your happiness is not for anyone else to judge. Only you can truly know if you’re happy in your relationship. Don’t let someone else’s doubts cause you to question your own feelings.

Conclusion

Navigating relationships is a complex journey, and it’s made even more challenging when others voice their doubts or wait for your relationship to fail.

These eight phrases can serve as red flags. If you hear them often, take a step back, and consider the intentions behind them. Remember, your relationship is yours to nurture and protect.

In my book, Breaking The Attachment: How To Overcome Codependency in Your Relationship, I delve deeper into these topics and share strategies on how to cultivate a healthy, fulfilling relationship amidst external pressures.

Always remember, the strength of your relationship lies in your hands. Don’t let anyone else’s opinions or expectations dictate its course.