If a man displays these 7 behaviors, he is deeply insecure about himself

You’ve just got a new man in your life. 

Everything is going great. At least, that’s what you thought. 

He’s sweet, charming, and funny – everything you ever wanted in a partner. Plus his taste in Netflix shows reads like a love letter.

However, something seems a little off. 

When it’s just the two of you, everything’s all peaches and roses.

But whenever you bring up meeting your friends or trying something new, he starts to clam up and become guarded. It’s like he’s a different person. 

You start to wonder, did you do something wrong? Or is it him?

It could be nothing, and maybe you’re reading too much into it. But if your man displays these seven behaviors, he’s probably deeply insecure about himself.

1) He’s reluctant to try new things

It’s Friday night and you want to try that new dining experience in town. 

You’ve booked a table (he wasn’t going to) and picked out an outfit ready for a night of romance. 

You’re really excited, but he seems reluctant. 

Instead, he’d rather stay home, order the same takeout you always get, and binge-watch the latest series of Love Island in his jammies – with you by his side, of course. 

Ordinarily, that sounds like heaven. But this isn’t the first time he’s turned down trying something different.

And if he has trouble stepping out of his comfort zone, or regularly avoids new experiences, it may signify insecurity issues.

Of course, this isn’t limited to experimenting with exotic cuisine. 

Going to new places, meeting new people, and being thrown into unfamiliar situations make him uneasy. 

Ultimately, he fears judgment. And that demonstrates a lack of self-assuredness on his part.

It could also be an indicator of social anxiety or avoidant personality disorder.

2) He constantly needs validation from others

Even confident people need a little reassurance here and there. And that’s okay!

But if he’s always on his phone seeking approval from you and others, it can be a major drag.

And if he can’t make a decision without your input first or he can’t stop checking his likes and mentions, he might be struggling with low self-esteem. 

This behavior isn’t uncommon. And nowadays, we’re all slaves to our smartphones – be it for work or play.

However, when we reply on social media to feel valued or we use it excessively, it can be damaging to our mental health. 

Not only that, but it doesn’t help address the real problem. It’s only a temporary fix.

And that brings us to our next point.

3) He relies on material possessions to feel good

Who doesn’t like a man who looks after himself? And we all love a good glow-up!

But if he places too much value on “things” to bolster his self-worth it’s not exactly attractive now, is it?

And like the above, it screams textbook validation-seeking behavior. Not to mention, it reeks of desperation and insecurity. 

Look, I’m not saying he has to throw all his possessions in the trash like we’re on an episode of Marie Kondo.

However, if he can’t function or “be himself” without all the bling, fancy cars, or the latest pair of sneakers, he’s never going to grow as a person or learn to value himself for who he is without all the stuff.

And at the end of the day, it’s all just smoke, mirrors, and Instagram filters. 

4) He brags way too much

Whenever I meet someone who brags just a little bit too much, I start to question their motives.

And I ask myself, if they’re really that confident in themselves, what are they trying to prove?

More often than not, it’s all a facade! 

And that over-the-top display of wealth, intelligence, or manliness is him overcompensating to hide his insecurities.

In fact, that narcissistic behavior isn’t self-love at all, it’s self-loathing in disguise.

So if the man in your life constantly boasts about his achievements or possessions in order to demonstrate his worth to others, consider this. 

Is his excessive bragging a sign that he’s genuinely happy and content? 

Or is it all a ruse, and in reality, he’s desperately seeking external validation from you and others by being the center of attention?

If it’s the latter, he has low self-worth. 

And if it’s the former. Well, to put it politely. Perhaps he’s a little too confident. Not to mention, he’s probably lacking some self-awareness and humility. 

5) He can’t stop putting others down

You’re madly in love, but something is bothering you.

Whenever you make the slightest mistake, he’s the first to point it out. And it’s even worse when you’re around other people. 

It started out small enough. An innocent comment here, a harmless joke there. 

But as time goes on, you’ve noticed it more and more. And you’re fed up with him pointing out every imperfection.

Not only that, but he does it to other people too. Just not always to their faces.

Sometimes, to feel better about themselves, insecure people lash out by belittling others. And by highlighting someone’s flaws, it helps boost their self-esteem. At least temporarily. 

However, this apparent superiority complex is all an act, a way to defend themselves against feeling inadequate. 

Think of it as a preemptive attack to avoid getting called out first for their own perceived shortcomings by projecting their insecurities onto someone else. 

And in reality, they’re probably just self-conscious. Or it could stem from jealousy. 

6) He constantly compares himself to others

Is he continuously comparing himself to others? Perhaps he’s easily threatened by the other men in your life?

Not only does this behavior highlight existing insecurities. But when he’s in a relationship, those feelings can become amplified and manifest as jealousy or possessiveness. 

And by constantly measuring his value against external standards, such as male coworkers, friends, or previous boyfriends, it reveals his inability to appreciate his own qualities. 

This can conjure up feelings of inferiority and inadequacy. As a result, his shaky self-image may prevent him from feeling worthy of love or praise.

Of course, comparing ourselves to others isn’t always a bad thing. And it can actually be useful, by providing us with a baseline and the motivation to be better.

But if the outcome is often a negative self-image, it might be time to investigate the root of his insecurities. 

7) He doesn’t respond well to criticism

When someone feels insecure, it can be difficult to give them constructive feedback. No matter how slight or well-intentioned. 

It’s not that they don’t want to learn or improve. But unfortunately, their fragile self-image often takes center stage. 

And if your beau exhibits perfectionist traits, it could spell trouble for his already flimsy confidence. As a result, he may become overly defensive or reactive when faced with criticism.

However, when you’re in a relationship, always having to tread lightly by watching what you say and how you say it can be extremely draining.

So if you recognize any of the behaviors above, remember to take another look. 

Is he really giving off red flags? Or is he actually just insecure and in need of reassurance and support from the person he values the most?

Also read: How to overcome insecurity: 7 practical steps for building self-confidence