If someone displays these 10 behaviors in a conversation, they have high social intelligence

Ever found yourself lost in conversation with someone who just seems to “get it”? You know, that person who effortlessly navigates social situations and always knows the right thing to say?

Chances are, you’ve had the pleasure of interacting with someone possessing high social intelligence.

Although understanding this concept may seem daunting to some, it’s actually quite fascinating and can reveal a lot about how some people interact so effectively with the world around them.

Let’s delve into the nuances of social intelligence and highlight 10 key behaviors that these socially adept individuals often display during conversations!

1) Active listening

Ever been in a conversation where you felt truly heard and understood? That’s probably because you were dealing with someone who possesses high social intelligence.

People with high social intelligence are active listeners. They don’t just hear the words; they absorb the emotions, the subtext, and the underlying messages. They’re also very present in the conversation, not distracted by their own thoughts or external factors.

This doesn’t mean they’re pushovers or people-pleasers; they simply understand the value of genuinely listening to others and making them feel validated.

Whether they’re nodding in agreement, asking thoughtful questions, or summarizing what you’ve said to show their understanding, these individuals know how to make others feel heard.

2) Empathy in action

One of the most profound experiences I’ve had was with a friend who displayed an incredible level of empathy. It’s an experience that still resonates with me and embodies the role of empathy in high social intelligence.

People with high social intelligence don’t just understand empathy; they live it. They have the ability to put themselves in other people’s shoes and genuinely feel their emotions.

There was this one time when I was going through a rough patch. My friend, instead of offering clichéd advice or trying to fix things, simply sat with me and shared my pain. She didn’t need to say much. Her understanding eyes and comforting presence were enough to make me feel less alone.

3) Reading non-verbal cues

People with high social intelligence have an uncanny knack for picking up on non-verbal cues. They can read beyond words and understand what’s not being said.

They notice the slight twitch of an eyebrow, the nervous tapping of a foot, or the subtle change in tone. This allows them to gauge the emotions and intentions of the person they’re interacting with.

This skill doesn’t just come in handy during intense negotiations or detective work; it’s valuable in everyday conversations too. It helps socially intelligent individuals respond appropriately and engage more effectively.

4) Adapting communication styles

No two conversations are the same. This is something that people with high social intelligence understand well. They have the ability to adapt their communication style based on who they’re interacting with.

For instance, they might speak more formally with a senior executive, use simpler language with a child, or include more technical terms when conversing with a fellow expert.

Interestingly, this ability to shift communication styles is linked to a concept known as ‘code-switching‘.

It’s a term originally used in linguistics but has been extended to social interactions, referring to the practice of altering speech, behavior, and presentation depending on the social context or audience.

5) Offering genuine praise

People with high social intelligence understand the profound impact of genuine praise. They know that a heartfelt compliment can uplift spirits, boost confidence, and even strengthen relationships.

These individuals don’t offer flattery or give compliments for the sake of it. Instead, they highlight specific qualities, actions or achievements, making their praise meaningful and sincere.

For instance, instead of simply saying “Great job!”, they might say, “I was really impressed by your presentation today. Your ability to explain complex concepts in such an accessible way is truly commendable.”

Such thoughtful compliments not only make others feel appreciated, but also reveal a deep understanding and appreciation of their strengths and efforts.

6) Managing conflict tactfully

Conflict is an inevitable part of human interactions. However, people with high social intelligence handle these situations with remarkable tact and grace.

They don’t shy away from conflicts, nor do they allow emotions to escalate them. Instead, they focus on finding a common ground and resolving disagreements in a respectful and constructive manner.

These individuals are skilled at diffusing tension, acknowledging different perspectives, and guiding the conversation towards a resolution.

Their approach to conflict isn’t about winning or losing, but it comes from understanding and collaboration. They understand that disagreements can lead to growth and improvement when handled well.

7) Displaying humility

Humility is a quiet but powerful trait of those with high social intelligence. These individuals understand that they don’t have all the answers and are open to learning from others.

Regardless of their knowledge or expertise, they don’t let ego get in the way of their interactions. They listen with an open mind, appreciate others’ perspectives, and are not afraid to admit when they’re wrong.

Their humility allows them to learn and grow continuously. It also makes others feel valued and respected, fostering stronger relationships.

8) Understanding timing and pace

In the world of music, timing and pace are crucial for harmony. The same principle applies to conversations. People with high social intelligence understand the importance of timing and pace in effective communication.

They know when to pause for emphasis, when to speed up to maintain interest, and when to slow down to allow the other person to absorb information. They also recognize the right moment to interject, ask questions, or change the topic.

Did you know that this ability is linked to a concept in psychology known as ‘conversational synchrony‘? It refers to the natural rhythm that develops between individuals during effective communication, leading to improved understanding and rapport.

9) Practicing patience

I’ll never forget the day when I realized the importance of patience in communication. It was during a conversation with my grandmother who, due to her age, would often struggle to find the right words.

People with high social intelligence practice patience in their conversations. They don’t rush others or try to finish their sentences. They understand that everyone has a unique pace and style of communicating, and they respect it.

During those conversations with my grandmother, even though it sometimes took her a while to express her thoughts, I would sit patiently, giving her the time and space she needed. It was in those moments that I learned to appreciate the beauty of patience in communication.

10) Fostering Authentic Connections

At the heart of social intelligence is the ability to foster authentic connections. People with high social intelligence don’t just converse; they connect.

They share their thoughts and feelings openly, invite others to do the same, and build relationships based on mutual understanding and respect.

But it’s not just about creating a bond; it’s about maintaining it. They invest time and effort in nurturing these relationships, understanding that meaningful connections don’t happen overnight.

So, if you meet someone who seems to effortlessly build and maintain genuine connections, they’re simply demonstrating their high social intelligence.