if someone displays these 12 behaviors, they’re clearly a control freak
Have you ever felt like someone is always watching or trying to control you?
Or known someone who just can’t seem to let go and let things be?
If so, you might be dealing with a control freak.
But we’re not just talking about people who like to take the lead sometimes or those who like things neat and tidy.
We’re talking about people who feel the need to control everything and everyone around them all the time.
And trust me, they aren’t happy when they can’t.
In this article, we’re going to talk about the signs that show someone might be a control freak.
These signs can be hard to spot because they can seem like normal behavior at first. But once you know what to look for, it will be easier for you to know when someone is trying to control too much.
So get ready, because we’re about to expose the control freaks!
1) They need to have the last word
You know that person who always needs to have the last word in any discussion or argument?
Yeah, that could be a sign of a control freak. They feel a compelling need to be right and always get their point across, no matter what.
It’s not just about winning the argument for them – it’s about asserting their dominance and control.
If they don’t get the final say, they can become irritable or even aggressive.
Now, everyone likes to be heard — it’s human nature to want to defend your viewpoint.
But with control freaks, it’s a whole different ball game. Their need to have the last word often overrides the feelings and opinions of others, making conversations with them feel more like a battlefield than a dialogue.
2) They’re always micro-managing
Ever had someone hover over your shoulder, watching your every move, and dictating how things should be done, even when it’s something you’re perfectly capable of handling?
If so, you’ve encountered a micro-manager, who is often a control freak in disguise.
Control freaks have a hard time trusting others to get the job done right (or rather, their way).
So they feel compelled to oversee every single detail. From how you tie your shoes to how you draft an email, they’re always there to “guide” you.
The key thing to remember here is that it’s not about helping you improve or grow; it’s about them maintaining control. It’s about things being done their way, and only their way.
3) They can’t handle unexpected changes
Here’s something I’ve personally experienced. I once had a friend who planned everything down to the smallest detail.
Now, I’m all for planning – it keeps things organized and avoids last-minute chaos, but their level of planning was on another spectrum.
One day we planned a casual beach day. But when the weather turned sour, I suggested we switch our plans and go to a nearby museum instead.
While this seemed like a simple change to me, my friend couldn’t handle it. They got anxious, irritated, and it pretty much ruined their day.
This is another classic sign of a control freak – they struggle when things don’t go according to plan.
Control freaks have a specific way they want things to unfold, and unexpected changes throw them off balance. They find it hard to adapt and can react negatively when presented with surprises.
4) They’re overly critical
A major characteristic of a control freak is an overly critical nature.
They tend to find fault in almost everything – be it your choice of clothes, your work style, or even the way you speak. Nothing seems good enough for them unless it aligns with their own standards and expectations.
This trait is often a defensive mechanism they use to avoid facing their own shortcomings. It’s easier for them to point the finger at others than to look inwards and deal with their own flaws.
This constant criticism isn’t about making you better, but about them maintaining a position of superiority and control.
So the next time someone can’t seem to stop criticizing you or others around them, remember this point and take it with a grain of salt! The problem might not be you, but their need for control.
5) They struggle to express vulnerability
Now, this one might tug at your heartstrings a bit. Control freaks often have a tough time expressing vulnerability.
For them, showing any form of weakness or uncertainty is equivalent to losing control, and that’s something they can’t afford.
It’s important to remember that behind this need for control often lies a deep-seated fear.
Fear of rejection, fear of being seen as inadequate, or fear of being hurt. They believe that by controlling everything around them, they can protect themselves from these fears.
So if someone in your life always appears strong and in control, never letting their guard down or talking about their fears or insecurities, they might be struggling with control issues.
And while it might be tough dealing with them at times, remember that empathy can go a long way. After all, we’re all human, dealing with our own battles!
6) They frequently make decisions for others
This one takes me back to my college days.
I had a roommate who always took it upon herself to make decisions for me, whether it was choosing what movie we should watch, deciding where we should eat, or even picking the decor for our room.
At first, I thought she was just assertive and knew what she wanted. But over time, I realized it was more about control than consideration.
Control freaks often display this tendency to make decisions for others without their input.
In their mind, they believe they know what’s best for everyone around them and they don’t hesitate to impose their decisions, even if it means overriding the wishes or preferences of others.
7) They struggle to delegate tasks
Now, I’m going to be straight-up with you – control freaks suck at delegating tasks.
Why? Because they firmly believe that if you want something done right, you’ve got to do it yourself.
And that’s not just a saying for them, it’s a way of life.
They find it incredibly hard to trust others with tasks, no matter how simple or complex. In their minds, nobody can do it quite like they can. This often leads them to overwork themselves and creates unnecessary stress both for them and those around them.
If there’s someone in your life who just can’t seem to let go of the reins and trust others with tasks, you might be dealing with a control freak.
8) They often display signs of perfectionism
Control freaks often lean towards perfectionism. They set incredibly high standards for themselves and others around them. They believe that everything needs to be perfect and any deviation from this perfection is unacceptable.
Perfectionism gives control freaks a sense of order and predictability. By striving for perfection, they feel they can control the outcomes and avoid failure or disappointment.
But remember, nobody’s perfect and it’s okay to make mistakes. So if someone in your life is constantly striving for unrealistic levels of perfection, they might be dealing with control issues.
It’s important to remind them (and ourselves) that it’s okay to be human!
9) They often manipulate situations
This one hit pretty close to home for me, because I once had a friend who had a knack for subtly manipulating situations to her advantage.
It was rarely overt or malicious, but it was always about maintaining control. Whether it was guilt-tripping me into going to a party I didn’t want to attend or subtly steering conversations to suit her narrative, she always found a way to be in control.
This is because control freaks are often masters of manipulation. They know how to twist situations and conversations in a way that ensures things always go their way.
They’re rarely confrontational about it — instead, they use subtle tactics that you might not even notice until you’re well into the situation.
10) They’re often inflexible
Let’s not sugarcoat it – control freaks can be pretty rigid.
Their way is the ‘right’ way and any deviation from that is just plain wrong. They have a set routine, a set plan, and a set way of doing things. And they aren’t big fans of improvisation or spontaneity.
This inflexibility often stems from their fear of losing control. Any change or unpredictability threatens their sense of control and causes them discomfort.
11) They constantly need to know where you are
Control freaks often need to know where you are, who you’re with, and what you’re doing at all times. It’s not because they care about you – it’s because they need to feel in control of the situation.
Sure, checking in on someone is normal to a certain extent, but when it becomes excessive, it’s not about concern – it’s about control.
12) They refuse to admit when they’re wrong
Last but certainly not least, control freaks find it incredibly hard to admit when they’re wrong.
Accepting their mistakes feels like losing control to them, and that’s something they just can’t handle.
Admitting you’re wrong requires vulnerability and humility – two things that control freaks struggle with.
So if someone in your life never seems to accept their mistakes or apologize, chances are they’re a control freak.
Keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes and it’s okay to admit them. It doesn’t make you weak — it makes you human!
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