8 little things you don’t realize you’re doing that instantly make people feel comfortable around you

by Tina Fey | September 4, 2025, 5:02 pm

When someone walks into a room and instantly makes you feel at ease, you know they have that special something.

It’s not about the words they say or even the actions they take, but rather, something that’s woven into the fabric of their character.

These individuals have a knack for making others feel comfortable without even realizing it, and the interesting thing is that they usually do this through a series of small gestures and habits that go unnoticed to most.

In this article, I’m going to share with you eight little things that you might be doing which instantly put people at ease.

You might not even be aware of these, but once I point them out, you’ll start to notice just how impactful they can be.

Get ready to dive in and discover the small yet mighty actions that can transform any interaction into a comfortable one:

1) Your natural empathy shines through

It’s a funny thing, isn’t it? How you can walk into a room and instantly feel the vibe? That’s not some mystical power you have, but it’s your natural ability to empathize with others.

This unspoken language of feelings and emotions is something you’ve mastered without even realizing it. You can sense when someone’s having a rough day, or when they’re bursting with good news that they can’t wait to share.

In response, you adjust your behaviour. You lend a listening ear or share in their joy, making them feel understood and accepted.

This ability to read and respond to people’s emotional states not only makes you a good friend but also creates a warm and inviting atmosphere where others feel at ease.

The best part? You do this without even thinking about it because it’s just who you are, and people appreciate it more than you know.

2) You’re always willing to make the first move

Remember back in high school when there was always that one person who would start the conversation, break the ice, or initiate the group project? Well, that person was me.

I’ve always found it easy to make the first move, whether it’s walking up to a stranger at a networking event, striking up a conversation with a quiet coworker in the breakroom, or even just sending the first text message.

I guess I’ve always understood that everyone has their own insecurities and fears. Sometimes, all it takes is one person to make the first move and break down those barriers.

By doing so, I’ve noticed that people instantly feel more comfortable around me. They appreciate that I took the pressure off them to initiate, and they feel more open and relaxed as a result.

If you’re often the one to make the first move without even thinking about it, know that you’re creating a comfortable atmosphere for those around you.

3) You mirror the body language of others

You might not even notice it, but when you’re engaging in a conversation, you tend to subtly mimic the gestures and expressions of the person you’re talking to.

This is called mirroring, a natural human phenomenon that signals empathy and rapport.

When you mirror someone’s body language, it sends a message that you’re on the same wavelength. It creates a sense of familiarity and comfort, making the other person feel more connected to you.

The next time you find yourself instinctively leaning in when someone else does, or matching their pace when walking side by side, know that your body language is silently making others feel more comfortable around you.

4) You’re a good listener

Not just hearing words, but actually listening. You’re engrossed in their stories, you empathize with their experiences, and you remember the tiny details they mention in passing.

People can tell when someone is genuinely interested in what they have to say. It makes them feel valued and respected.

If you’re the type to listen more than you speak, know that this is a gift that instantly makes people feel comfortable around you.

You’re providing a safe space for them to share, to vent, or just to feel heard—and that’s something truly special.

5) You make an effort to remember names

If you’ve always made a conscious effort to remember people’s names, and not just those I see regularly, then you’ve always been making people comfortable from the very start.

Whether it’s the barista who makes your coffee every morning or a new acquaintance at a social gathering, you make sure to use their name during our conversation.

To me, that’s a sign of respect and shows that you value interactions and, from what I’ve observed, it makes people feel seen and appreciated.

6) You’re not afraid to show your flaws

Perfection can be intimidating, but when you show your flaws and admit to your mistakes, you become relatable.

People are drawn to authenticity. They appreciate it when someone can laugh at their own blunders or share stories of their past mishaps.

When you’re open about your imperfections, you give others the freedom to be imperfect too.

This creates an environment of acceptance and comfort.

If you’re someone who can embrace your flaws and not take yourself too seriously, know that you’re setting the stage for others to feel comfortable in their own skin around you.

7) You respect personal space

We all have our own invisible bubble, a personal space that we subconsciously guard. When someone respects that space, it instantly makes us feel safe and comfortable.

If you’re the type to maintain a respectful distance during conversations, or to ask before borrowing someone’s things, you’re likely making those around you feel at ease.

Your respect for personal boundaries creates a sense of security and trust, which is key in making others feel comfortable around you.

8) You’re genuinely kind

At the end of the day, nothing makes people feel more comfortable than genuine kindness. It’s about showing respect, offering help when needed, or simply giving a warm smile.

Kindness creates an atmosphere of positivity and acceptance as it tells people they’re in a safe and welcoming space.

If you’re the type to extend kindness without expecting anything in return, know that you’re doing the most important thing to make people feel comfortable around you. It’s a simple gesture, but its impact is profound.

A final thought

As we wrap up, I invite you to ponder on one simple truth: Making people feel comfortable around you is less about doing and more about being. It’s about being empathetic, being genuine, and being kind.

These little things you’re doing, they’re not just actions. They are reflections of who you are and emanate from a place of understanding and respect for others.

Keep doing what you’re doing and keep being who you are because, in this fast-paced world where everyone is rushing, it’s people like you who create the safe spaces, the comfortable corners where others can just be.

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