People who are naturally confident do these 9 things differently

Natural confidence and false confidence are two very different things.

Sometimes, the loudest person in the room may seem like the most confident. But most of the time, they couldn’t be further from it.

Their “confidence” could all be an act to put others down, make themselves seem better than they are, and (ultimately) fulfill their craving for admiration and attention.

Usually, it’s the people who have a natural, quiet confidence who are the most admirable.

These people just do certain things differently from others.

Think you might be someone who has a natural, quiet confidence about you – that some people overlook?

Check out these 9 things naturally confident people do differently to know for sure!

1) They have impeccable social skills

First things first, confident people are great at socializing.

They can talk to anyone about anything. They can also make others feel good about themselves, rather than inadequate or inferior.

Natural confidence (rather than false confidence) is also usually equated to high emotional intelligence (EQ).

When you have high EQ, you have a good understanding of how to talk to people, how to hold an engaging conversation, and even how to make people feel good about themselves when talking to them.

False confidence, on the other hand, is when someone puts on a front and attempts to intimidate others to make themselves seem more confident (and to hide the fact that they aren’t very confident at all!).

Naturally confident people won’t always be the life and soul of the party. But they will be able to comfortably attend the party and feel worthy of being there – without putting on a front to prove it!

2) They handle criticism with grace

Sure, naturally confident people are just good at socializing. But that doesn’t mean they get along with everyone.

Not everyone is going to like you – unfortunately, that’s just a fact. Plus, not everyone is always going to believe you’re as good as you do.

But naturally confident people don’t let these things get to them.

When they’re criticized, they see it as a critique that they can learn from – rather than a reason to feel bad about themselves.

Likewise, if someone doesn’t like them and outright puts them down, they can brush it off without causing a big fuss.

Essentially, they’re pretty graceful about how they handle criticism – constructive or otherwise. And it mostly stems from how they don’t particularly need validation from others to feel good about themselves.

Which leads us nicely to our next point:

3) They accept compliments easily

Ever heard a conversation that goes a little bit like this:

“You look nice today” – person one.

“Who me? No, I don’t! Don’t be ridiculous, I couldn’t look any worse!” – person two.

If so, person two has a bit of a hard time accepting compliments from others.

When you think about why some people reject compliments so ferociously, it’s usually because they don’t believe them or don’t feel worthy of them.

Which is a very sad truth, but a truth, nonetheless.

But when you’re a naturally confident person, you’re very good at self-validating. You can tell yourself good things about the decisions you make and the way you look – without needing someone else to confirm it’s the truth.

So when someone else offers you compliments, you can quite happily accept them without making a big fuss out of it.

It sounds bad to say that it’s because you think you’re worthy of the compliment, but it’s kind of true. Because you have enough self-worth to accept it and take it for what it is.

4) They have a good sense of humor

Another thing about naturally confident people is they have a good sense of humor about them.

They can laugh at others’ jokes and crack good jokes for themselves.

An interesting study found that people view those who tell funny jokes as confident and competent. And even when the joke isn’t funny, they still think they’re a confident person!

Other research finds that when you laugh often, you’re more likely to be smarter, friendlier, and more satisfied with your life.

This ultimately means that if you can laugh at yourself and the jokes of others, you’re more likely to be a confident person – plus a bit of a joy to be around.

5) They ask for help when they need it

There’s an unusual perception that to be confident, you have to know all the answers.

But this isn’t really true – and believing this is more of a trait of someone with false confidence rather than natural confidence.

In fact, it takes a lot of courage to admit that you need help or ask a question about something you don’t understand.

I remember a project manager I worked with oozed confidence. She was very good at her job – but she wasn’t a “subject matter expert” in anything.

And it was this open acknowledgment of when she didn’t know and her ability to ask questions that made her so good at her job!

She didn’t care that some might find her questions a sign that she lacked confidence or intelligence.

Her confidence didn’t come from knowing the answers to everything or being able to do everything. It came from the way she presented herself, first and foremost.

But it also came from how fearlessly she asked for help when help was needed – with no shame and no reason to hide!

6) They don’t overshare

Just because someone talks a lot, that doesn’t mean they’re a naturally confident person. Sometimes, it can mean the complete opposite!

People who overshare sometimes do so because they crave attention and validation from others, according to experts. They feel like the more they talk, the more likely people are to compliment them or help them regulate their emotions.

Whereas someone with natural confidence is often quite selective about the things they share (and who they share them with).

They don’t feel the need to gain validation on every decision, life event, or thing they did wrong.

Instead, they can get what they need from their own mindset and sense of self-worth.

7) They open up to people they trust

Yes, naturally confident people don’t overshare. But they also have no issue opening up to people they trust.

I dated a guy once who told me it was weak to open up. I told him he was wrong. Talking about how you feel – even with someone you trust – takes a lot of strength and courage.

Naturally, it didn’t work out with us. And I believe he’s still single. I also believe he made that comment because he lacked a bit of confidence in himself, deep down.

And he said those things to put on a front of confidence, rather than really having it.

Because truly confident people aren’t afraid of being the person they are – emotions and all. And their sense of self isn’t tied to the view that other people have of them.

Which is why they can, quite happily, open up to people when it feels right for them.

8) They try new things without expectations

When you have natural confidence, you’re not terribly stuck in your ways.

You’re quite happy to give new things a try, whether that be a new job, career path, course, or hobby.

You don’t shy away from doing new things for fear that you might not be good at it.

You also don’t try new things with the expectation that you’re going to excel at it – and the feeling that you won’t be good enough if you don’t succeed at first!

Instead, when you have natural confidence, you’re open to change and a challenge.

And you’re quite happy to give new things a go without it impacting your sense of self-worth or self-esteem if you don’t immediately succeed.

9) They talk to share, learn, and discuss (not gloat, cause drama, or prove a point)

Finally, naturally confident people have a way of talking about things that’s just different from most other people.

When you have this kind of internal value, you have no desire to gloat or prove your worth to someone.

Instead (as mentioned earlier), the majority of your validation and sense of self-worth comes from within.

So you see no reason to gloat, prove to everyone that you know everything, or cause drama with the way you speak about things.

When you engage in conversations with others, your intentions are genuine and you do so to discuss topics, learn new things, give advice, or receive it.

You don’t talk to inspire hate, make others feel inferior, or make your intelligence (and false confidence) known.

Final thoughts

No one other than you can really decide how much confidence you have in yourself.

Or how much self-worth or self-esteem you possess.

But usually, deep down you know whether you’re a confident person and whether you’re putting on a show.

When you’re the latter, it’s not impossible to turn that false confidence into true, natural confidence.

When you’re the former, you know that outside of this article, this is probably the only validation you need to know that you have natural confidence.

Which is, really, a pretty special thing!