People who are really difficult to be around often exhibit these 9 behaviors (without realizing it)

Interacting with people isn’t always a walk in the park. Sometimes, the people we encounter can be really hard to be around, and often, they don’t even realize it!

These individuals unknowingly exhibit certain behaviors that can make them a challenge to deal with. It’s not necessarily about being bad or good, more about being unaware of how their actions impact others.

So, let’s delve into this topic. We’re going to identify 9 common behaviors that are often exhibited by folks who are tricky to be around. And remember, this isn’t about pointing fingers; it’s about understanding and awareness.

Let’s get started. 

1) Constant negativity

We all have those days where everything seems to go wrong, but there’s a difference between having a bad day and being perpetually negative.

Some folks are stuck in a cycle of negativity, often without even realizing it. They see the glass as half empty, not half full, and their outlook can be draining for those around them.

These individuals tend to focus on the problems rather than the solutions. They’re the first ones to predict doom and gloom and the last ones to see a silver lining.

This kind of habitual pessimism can make it challenging for others to be in their company for extended periods. After all, who wants to be around someone who only sees the worst in every situation?

Being aware of this behavior is the first step towards making a change. And remember, it’s not about forcing positivity; it’s about adopting a more balanced perspective.

2) Lack of empathy

I’ve encountered individuals in my life who seem to lack a basic understanding of empathy. It’s like they’re missing the ability to put themselves in someone else’s shoes.

Take my old college roommate, for instance. She would often blare loud music late into the night, even though she knew I had early classes the next morning. When I’d ask her to turn it down, she’d just shrug it off, saying that she couldn’t study without music.

Her behavior demonstrated a clear lack of empathy towards my situation. It wasn’t that she was intentionally trying to be difficult, but her inability to understand my perspective made it challenging to live with her.

People who lack empathy often don’t realize how their actions can affect others. It’s not necessarily that they’re bad people, but this lack of awareness can make them difficult to be around.

3) Interrupting others

In the world of conversation, there’s a common rule: let others finish their thoughts before you start yours. However, some people frequently break this rule, often without realizing it.

Constantly interrupting others can be a sign of impatience or a desire to dominate the conversation. It’s a disruptive behavior that can make others feel unheard and undervalued.

Interestingly, a study by the University of California found that men interrupt 33% more often than women, particularly in mixed-gender conversations. This doesn’t mean all men are serial interrupters or that women never interrupt, but it does highlight a trend.

People who frequently interrupt may not realize they’re doing it, but it’s a behavior that can make them difficult to be around. It’s essential to learn the art of active listening and respect the conversational space of others.

4) Overly critical

Criticism is a part of life. Constructive criticism can help us grow and improve. But there’s a difference between constructive feedback and being overly critical.

Some people have a tendency to be overly critical, constantly finding fault in others or in situations. They nitpick and criticize without offering any positive or constructive input.

This behavior can be draining for those on the receiving end. It can lower self-esteem and create a negative environment. Furthermore, it makes the criticizer difficult to be around, as their constant negativity can be exhausting and disheartening.

It’s important for individuals to realize when they’re being overly critical and learn to balance their feedback with positive reinforcement.

5) Being self-centered

We all like to share our thoughts, experiences, and achievements with others. But there’s a fine line between sharing and dominating every conversation with a focus solely on oneself.

People who constantly talk about themselves without showing interest in others can be difficult to interact with. They often steer conversations back to their own experiences or achievements, leaving little room for others to contribute.

This self-centered behavior might not be intentional, but it can make others feel overlooked and unimportant. It’s crucial to remember that effective communication is a two-way street, and showing genuine interest in others goes a long way in building strong relationships.

6) Dishonesty

Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship, be it personal or professional. And nothing erodes trust faster than dishonesty.

I’ve seen firsthand how a single lie can shatter trust and damage a relationship beyond repair. It’s heartbreaking, really. It’s not just about the lie itself, but also the trail of suspicion and doubt it leaves behind.

People who frequently lie, even about small things, can be incredibly difficult to be around. It’s hard to build a solid connection with someone when you’re constantly questioning their honesty.

Remember, honesty isn’t just about telling the truth; it’s about being real with yourself and others about who you are, what you want, and what you need. It’s about being genuine, authentic, and dependable.

7) Lack of boundaries

Boundaries are essential for maintaining respect and understanding in any relationship. Without them, things can quickly become uncomfortable and one-sided.

In my own life, I once had a friend who continually borrowed my things without asking. From clothes to books, I’d often find my belongings in her possession. It was as if she didn’t understand the concept of personal space or ownership.

This lack of boundaries made our friendship difficult to maintain. I felt disrespected and taken for granted, which eventually led to distance between us.

People who consistently overstep boundaries can be tough to be around. Recognizing and respecting others’ boundaries is crucial for maintaining healthy relationships.

8) Overbearing and controlling

Some people have a tendency to control everything around them, including the people they interact with. They try to dictate how things should be done and rarely leave room for others’ opinions or ideas.

This overbearing behavior can stem from various reasons, such as insecurity, fear of losing control, or simply a lack of understanding about other people’s needs and feelings.

Being around such individuals can be stressful and exhausting. It can feel like walking on eggshells, constantly having to conform to their rules and expectations.

It’s important for these individuals to learn the value of compromise and respect for others’ autonomy. After all, healthy relationships are built on mutual respect and understanding, not control.

9) Unwillingness to change

One of the most challenging behaviors to deal with is an unwillingness to change. Some people are stuck in their ways, resistant to any form of change, even when it’s for their own good or the good of others.

This stubborn behavior can be frustrating for those around them. It can hinder personal growth and strain relationships.

Change is an integral part of life; it’s how we learn and grow. Being open to change, to new ideas and experiences, is crucial for personal development and healthy relationships. It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it.

Final thoughts: It’s all about understanding

The complexities of human behavior are deeply intertwined with our upbringing, experiences, and sometimes, our own blind spots.

One fundamental thing to remember is that most people exhibiting these behaviors aren’t doing so intentionally. They may be oblivious to their actions and how these actions affect those around them.

The American psychologist Carl Rogers once said, “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” This holds true for all of us.

Self-awareness and understanding are the first steps towards improvement. Recognizing these behaviors in ourselves or others is not about blaming or labeling but rather about fostering understanding and empathy.

As we navigate through life’s social labyrinth, let’s remember to approach each other with kindness and patience. After all, we’re all works in progress, learning and growing one day at a time.