People with true humility exhibit these 12 traits

These days, humility is an underrated personal trait.

We’re all supposed to be building our personal brand, from the social media models to the online PR gurus to us writers putting our taglines at the end of every story.

And it’s true that in a world where attention is currency, humility can seem like a drawback.

But our personal relationships are different from our online presence.

Here’s the thing: nobody likes arrogant people.

And what they dislike even more is somebody who pretends to be humble but actually isn’t.

On the other hand, true humility is one of the most likable traits a person can possess.

And if you encounter these signs, in yourself or in other people, it’s a good indication that you’re dealing with someone who is truly humble instead of just pretending to be for online clout.

1) They don’t boast

Okay, this one is sort of obvious. But it’s one of the key signs of a person with genuine humility.

In many ways, we live in a culture that encourages boasting. But humble people don’t do that. They don’t try to tell you how great they are and brag about all their achievements, their possessions, their looks, or anything else about them.

Instead, people with true humility let their actions talk for them.

And because they don’t feel a need to seek out the approval of others, they are often much more pleasant to be around than people who are always trying to boast about how great they are.

2) They practice gratitude

Part of humility is understanding how much of your success is down to factors outside your control.

In my own experience, I’m pretty happy with my life. I’ve had multiple successful careers, have a happy relationship, and live with the person I love in a beautiful town on the Mediterranean while supporting myself by writing.

But here’s the thing: I don’t have these things because I’m so great.

Some of them happened because I got lucky. I happened to be in the right place at the right time to meet the woman who became my wife.

As a kid, I loved reading, and my parents encouraged me to read and write, with the result that now, I can make a career out of it.

That doesn’t mean I haven’t worked hard to get where I am. But it does mean that I’m grateful for all the things that were given to me that allow me to live the life I want.

People with true humility understand that life is chaotic, and that you need to be grateful for anything the universe sends your way.

Whether it’s as small as a delicious meal or as big as a job you love, humble people know they should be thankful for what they have and appreciate it, knowing not everyone gets the same chances in life.

3) They don’t put other people down

As if that’s not enough, humble people rarely put others down.

Partly that’s because they understand that their own success isn’t always because of them.

Partly it’s because they have high empathy, and know that putting others down can hurt them.

Partly it’s because people with humility don’t get their self-worth from the opinions of others, and so they don’t need to run other people down to make themselves look better.

Whatever the reason, people with true humility tend not to talk negatively about others, and that makes them some of the most likable people around.

4) They don’t take credit they don’t deserve

A humble person doesn’t need the praise of others to back up their own sense of self-worth.

That means they don’t take credit for things they don’t deserve.

That can include the things I mentioned earlier, like accidents of birth or being in the right place at the right time.

But it can also mean that they don’t take credit for things like:

• somebody else’s hard work on a project
• smart opinions they read in an article somebody else wrote
• funny jokes they got from someone else
• personal style that a friend helped them develop

A person with true humility will always give credit to others when it is due.

That doesn’t mean they won’t take credit when they deserve it. It just means they won’t lie or misrepresent the facts to make themselves seem better than they are.

5) They are polite

Manners are the glue of society. It’s how we learn how to treat one another in a respectful way.

On the other hand, some people seem to think that manners are for other people. They may even think that treating other people in a rude way makes them strong or commanding.

But humble people know that treating others with respect is the key to earning their respect in turn.

Simply put, humble people understand that they are not the center of the universe. They know intuitively that their story is not any more important or valuable than anybody else’s.

That means they are always polite to people they meet, understanding that everyone has just as much worth as they do.

6) They are not vain

There’s a difference between taking care of your appearance and being vain.

And humble people are never vain, because they don’t get their sense of self-worth from something as subjective and temporary as physical appearance.

Humble people may be physically beautiful, or they may not. But either way, they won’t get their self-worth from the way they look.

7) They are not materialistic

As if that’s not enough, humble people also tend not to be greedy or materialistic, either.

Here’s the thing: people who always have to have the latest and best phone, the flashiest car, and the biggest house are often deeply insecure. They buy material things because they think it will increase their status and make other people like them more.

Humble people have a strong enough sense of self to know that that’s not how you win lasting respect from other people. 

In other words, they don’t need to chase after material things to make themselves feel good.

8) They don’t envy others

At the same time, humble people rarely envy other people.

Whether it’s the things they own, the job they have, or the life they live, humble people know that there’s always a story behind what you see on the surface of other people’s lives.

Humble people can be as ambitious and driven as anyone else. But they are not driven by a desire to compete with others.

That means they are happy for the success of other people and don’t envy what they have.

9) They show empathy

One of the key traits of a humble person is empathy.

Humble people are both able and willing to put themselves in the shoes of others and imagine what life is like for them.

In fact, this is a big part of what makes them so humble in the first place.

Humility comes from realizing that you are no better and no worse than anyone else. If you can put yourself in the shoes of others, you can understand why they behave the way they do, even if it’s negative.

That’s why people with true humility often have a lot of empathy.

10) They’re not judgmental or self-righteous

No wonder humble people are rarely judgmental.

Their enhanced empathy means that humble people understand the failings and shortcomings of others.

A big part of having humility is understanding that we are all flawed. That’s why people with humility are rarely judgmental or self-righteous. After all, they know nobody is perfect.

11) They avoid self-destructive behaviors

This is a broad category. Self-destructive behaviors can include:

• substance abuse
• eating disorders
• workaholism
• self-harm
• negative self talk
• self-pity
• poor financial decisions
• physical neglect

Although the reasons why people indulge in these behaviors can be very complicated, it often comes down to a sense of bitterness and frustration at a life they don’t want to live.

People with humility tend to take better care of themselves. Lacking the bitterness that comes from thinking they deserve better, people with humility focus on creating positive change and avoid these destructive behaviors.

12) They don’t put themselves first

Finally, one of the most obvious signs of someone with a lot of humility is that they don’t put themselves before others.

This can manifest itself in so many different ways, from not taking the last slice of pizza to helping others get ahead in the workplace.

But however it manifests, humble people are often capable of great self-sacrifice.

That’s because they don’t see themselves as more important than the people around them.

And that, in turn, is what makes them such wonderful people to be around.

Signs of humble people

Being humble doesn’t mean that you minimize your achievements or don’t try to push yourself.

Instead, it means that you have a high level of empathy, don’t see yourself as more important than others, and will often help other people get ahead.

If you know someone who practices these behaviors, they probably have true humility. And that’s something we could all use a little more of in today’s world.