9 personality traits that make people instantly comfortable around you
Ever met someone who just has this natural talent for making people feel at ease? You know, the kind of person you instantly feel comfortable around, like an old friend you’ve known forever?
Well, I’ve certainly come across a few of these wonderful folks, and it got me thinking about what makes them so special.
Turns out, they’re blessed with some personality traits that just naturally endears them to people.
So, let’s dive into it – the 9 personality traits that make people instantly comfortable around you.
Because who doesn’t want to be that person who can turn any interaction into a cozy and welcoming experience?
1) Authenticity
I remember the first time I truly felt comfortable around someone instantly. It was my college roommate, Emma, whom I met on the first day of college.
It was a completely different environment from what I grew up in, so naturally, I felt scared and awkward. But once I met Emma, I immediately relaxed. I suddenly felt like college wasn’t the big, scary world I thought it’d be.
Because she was genuine, no pretenses, no masks. She was herself, and that made me feel at ease. She said, “Hey, let’s be scared together!”, and that brought down my guard.
You see, authenticity is powerful. It’s about staying true to who you are, your values, your beliefs.
You might think it’s safer to just nod your head or be a chameleon to fit in, but that’s not always the case.
Truth is, no one likes a people pleaser, a yes man or someone who changes their personality according to the room they’re in.
People appreciate authenticity because it makes them feel like they can be themselves too. Exactly like I felt with Emma – I didn’t need to put up a brave front.
2) Empathy
Another trait that goes a long way in making people feel comfortable around you is empathy.
I learned this the hard way when a friend of mine was going through a breakup. I kept offering advice and solutions when all she wanted was someone to listen, someone to understand her pain.
When I finally got it, our relationship changed drastically. She felt heard, understood and more comfortable around me than ever before.
Empathy is about understanding and sharing the feelings of another, not about fixing their problems. So don’t rush to offer advice or solutions, sometimes people just need a shoulder to lean on.
3) Good listening skills
Did you know that we spend roughly 60 percent of our communication time listening, but only retain about 25 percent of what we hear? No wonder good listeners are a rarity!
So when we do come across one, we instantly feel comfortable. A good listener is someone who not only hears what you are saying but also understands and engages with your thoughts and emotions.
They don’t interrupt, they don’t prepare their response while you’re still talking. Instead, they focus completely on you.
So, if you want to be that person who people feel comfortable around, work on your listening skills, as well as being…
4) Non-judgmental
Picture this: You’re sharing something personal with someone, and instead of getting judgment, you get understanding. That’s a powerful moment, isn’t it?
Being non-judgmental is a trait that instantly makes people feel comfortable. It allows them to be themselves, warts and all, without fear of being criticized or shamed.
Here’s why it’s such a game-changer:
- Non-judgmental individuals have a remarkable capacity for empathy. They put themselves in your shoes, not to judge or criticize, but to genuinely understand your perspective.
- They have an open-minded approach to life, realizing that everyone makes mistakes and has their own unique journey. This creates an atmosphere where you can be yourself without the fear of harsh judgments.
- When you’re around someone who doesn’t judge, it’s like a weight lifted off your shoulders. You feel lighter, more relaxed…instant positive vibes!
- Non-judgmental people are often great at offering support and encouragement. They lift you up rather than tearing you down, making you feel capable and valued.
5) Positivity
Speaking of positive vibes, how do you approach life? Are you the glass half-full type? Or half-empty?
Your outlook on life plays a significant role in how comfortable you make others feel. Optimism, in particular, is a key factor.
When you radiate positivity and optimism, you create an inviting aura. It’s like a warm embrace that envelops everyone around you.
Optimistic people tend to see the silver lining in even the cloudiest of situations, and this infectious optimism can’t help but make those in their presence feel at ease and hopeful.
So, whether you’re a born optimist or looking to adopt a sunnier outlook, embracing positivity can go a long way in making others feel comfortable and cherished in your company.
After all, who wouldn’t want to be around someone who brings out the best in everyone they meet?
6) Good sense of humor
Closely connected to positivity is a good sense of humor. A well-timed joke or a shared laugh can break the ice like nothing else.
People with a good sense of humor have a knack for making others feel welcome and relaxed.
It doesn’t mean you have to be funny all the time, though. Just knowing how to lighten the mood when needed can go a long way in making people feel comfortable around you.
7) Respect for boundaries
We’ve all met someone who doesn’t understand personal space or who overshadows our needs and wants. It’s uncomfortable, to say the least.
I know that I immediately get turned off when someone:
- Leans too close to me and invades my personal space
- Constantly interrupts not just me, but other people as well
- Brushes off my opinions or feelings
- Asks intrusive questions or pries into my personal life
That’s just a few examples of ways that you might feel disrespected. We might even do it ourselves at times when we’re not mindful.
So, if you want people to feel comfortable around you, mindfulness is key. It shows that you value the other person’s space, opinions, and time.
This trait creates a safe environment where people can be themselves without fear of judgment or intrusion. Respecting boundaries is more than just a nice thing to do – it’s a way of showing that you care.
8) Humility
This next trait is kind of a no-brainer. After all, no one likes a show-off. It’s as simple as that.
Humility is a trait that draws people in, a rather refreshing one. It’s always nice to talk to someone who isn’t preoccupied with flexing their strengths and achievements, or engages in some imaginary competition.
To make other people feel comfortable around you, stay grounded and modest. When people see that you’re humble, they feel more at ease, knowing that they won’t be judged or looked down upon
9) Patience
For this last trait, I’d like to share something I witnessed a few years ago. I was in a crowded restaurant for lunch with a friend, and the waitstaff assigned to our table was a new one.
It was her first day and she was clearly nervous. She made several mistakes, enough to make anyone annoyed. But my friend picked up on her anxiety, and resolved to be the most patient customer there.
When the waitress apologized for the third time for forgetting to bring the knives we’d asked for, he smiled and said, “It’s okay, we understand. It’s a busy day today, isn’t it?”
Immediately, she relaxed and her voice got a little less shaky. And me? I was in awe of how that simple act of patience could put someone else at ease.
Believe me, that’s something we could all add to our repertoire. The world certainly needs more kindness and patience!
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