If you use these 20 phrases, you’re probably an emotionally intelligent person

by Brendan Brown | April 28, 2024, 2:16 pm

Life’s a whirlwind of interactions, relationships, and personal growth. Part of this growth lies in developing emotional intelligence, a core asset that’s often overlooked. 

But perhaps you already know this – you’re here because you understand that emotional intelligence is key to both personal and professional success. 

Emotional intelligence, often abbreviated as EI or EQ (Emotional Quotient), is the ability to understand, use, and manage our own emotions in positive ways to relieve stress, communicate effectively, empathize with others, overcome challenges, and defuse conflict. 

It encompasses four main skills: 

These skills reflect in our language, in the words we choose, and in the phrases we use. 

And emotionally intelligent individuals navigate conversations with grace, empathy, and an uncanny ability to make others feel heard and understood.

Without further ado, here are 20 phrases that serve as markers of high emotional intelligence:

1) “I understand how you feel” 

This phrase signifies empathy—an ability to not only sympathize but to deeply understand others’ emotions. 

For instance, when a friend is grieving, an emotionally intelligent response would be, “I understand how you feel. It must be incredibly difficult to lose someone you care about.” 

This acknowledgement helps the other person feel understood and less isolated in their emotional state.

2) “I appreciate your perspective” 

Emotionally intelligent individuals embody an open-minded approach, valuing diverse viewpoints, and demonstrating a genuine desire to learn from others. 

You see, this capacity nurtures a deep respect for the thoughts and opinions of those around them.

For example, in a personal conversation, you might convey, “I value your perspective on this matter. It gives me a fresh and valuable insight that broadens my understanding.”

3) “I was wrong, and I apologize” 

Recognizing one’s mistakes and taking ownership of them demonstrates self-awareness and honesty. 

For example, you might express, “I apologize for interrupting you during the meeting. I realize it was wrong of me and I appreciate your understanding.” 

This acknowledgment provides the other person with a sense of validation and closure, fostering resolution in the situation.

Related: 16 signs you’re naturally good at empathizing with others

4) “I value your input” 

This demonstrates a genuine appreciation for the contributions of others and cultivates a healthy exchange of ideas. 

Consider this: You could personally express to a colleague, “I truly value your input on this project. Your creative ideas significantly enhance our work.” 

The truth is, such recognition not only makes them feel appreciated but also reassures them that their contributions hold great importance.

5) “How can I help you?” 

Conveying a genuine willingness to assist others, reflects compassion and empathy in action. 

By extending support, they make others feel genuinely cared for, easing their feelings of stress and overwhelm.

Next time you notice a stressed coworker, you could sincerely reach out and ask, “You seem overwhelmed. How can I help you?”

6) “Let’s find a solution together” 

By empowering and actively involving others, emotionally intelligent individuals foster a strong sense of teamwork and cooperation. 

So, they prioritize collaboration and problem-solving, as exemplified in conflict situations when they say: “Together, we can find a solution.” 

Put simply, this approach encourages cooperative efforts and promotes resolution instead of confrontation.

7) “I need some time to think” 

Demonstrating self-awareness, acknowledging the importance of reflection rather than impulsive reactions. 

Now, when confronted with a demanding decision, you could honestly state, “I require some time to contemplate before providing an answer.” 

And here’s the thing: 

Such respect for your need to introspect is appreciated, as it signifies patience and understanding from those around you.

8) “I don’t know, but I’ll find out” 

By placing trust in your honesty and unwavering commitment to knowledge, openly admitting when you lack information while eagerly seeking to learn, you reveal a remarkable blend of humility and intellectual curiosity. 

I vividly recall the first time I encountered a question to which I didn’t have an immediate answer. Summoning the courage, I candidly admitted, “I don’t know, but I made it my mission to find out.”

9) “You did a great job” 

Genuine recognition of others’ achievements not only fosters positive relationships and boosts confidence and motivation but also adds to collective success. 

For instance, when acknowledging a teammate’s excellent presentation, you might say, “You did a great job in that presentation, and your hard work contributed made a huge difference.”

10) “I’m here for you” 

In other words, demonstrating emotional support and understanding is a sign of empathy. 

To a friend going through a tough time, nothing helps more than these few words: “I’m here for you, no matter what you need.”

Related: If your partner does these 15 things, they love you deeply

11) “I appreciate your patience” 

Acknowledging the virtues of others and expressing gratitude for their understanding is a testament to emotional maturity. 

Consider this, next time you address a customer, a heartfelt expression such as, “I genuinely appreciate your patience as we work towards resolving this issue,” not only recognizes their virtue but also increases the likelihood of their continued patience in the future.

12) “How are you really feeling?” 

Have you noticed how people react when asked a simple question like “How are you feeling?”

It’s in these moments that a genuine interest in understanding the emotions of others truly shines.

So, if you observe a friend appearing upset, take the time to genuinely ask, “What’s really going on? How are you truly feeling?”

The truth is, by doing so, you create a powerful connection that shows you genuinely care and value their emotional well-being.

As a result of this invitation to share their true emotional state, a sense of trust is fostered, enabling them to express themselves honestly while knowing they are heard and supported.

Also read: 10 signs you’re actually a great parent even if you don’t think so

13) “Tell me more” 

Encouraging others to express their feelings fully indicates an openness to listening and understanding. 

If someone is sharing an experience with you, saying “Tell me more” encourages them to delve deeper into their story.

14) “I value our relationship” 

If there is one thing emotionally intelligent people do is they express the significance of personal connection. 

That doesn’t just strengthen the bond between you but also demonstrates an understanding of the vital role relationships play in our lives. 

A heartfelt statement to a long-time friend, such as “I truly cherish our relationship and all the precious memories we’ve shared,” conveys the deep value you place on your connection and the experiences you’ve had together.

15) “What can we learn from this?” 

This zest for learning and growth not only sparks inspiration but also banishes any inclination to dwell on the negative, forging a path towards continuous improvement.

Eagerly seizing challenges as invigorating stepping stones for growth is a hallmark of an optimistically charged mindset fueled by emotional intelligence

Here’s a suggestion for you: Next time you’re confronted with a project setback, try to unleash a wave of motivation by exclaiming, “Alright, let’s roll up our sleeves and dig deep into this setback! Let’s uncover the valuable lessons that will take us to even greater success next time!”

16) “I trust your judgement” 

By empowering and placing trust in others, we boost their self-confidence and encourage autonomy. 

You see, this phrase exemplifies a genuine respect for their abilities and decision-making, nurturing a strong foundation of trust. 

For instance, as a parent, you might tell your child, “I trust your judgment on this. Go ahead with your plan.” 

The truth is, such affirmation empowers them to make their own choices and instills a sense of responsibility and self-assurance, especially coming from their own parents!

17) “I believe in you” 

Now, this is a powerful one.

We’ve heard that resilience and self-esteem are nurtured through the provision of encouragement and belief.

With that said, allow me to share a personal experience: When my mother felt nervous about an upcoming holiday with friends, I offered her a heartfelt reassurance, saying: 

“Mom, I truly believe in you. You will have an incredible time and create amazing memories!” I believe this played a vital role in instilling confidence and boosting her self-esteem.

However, showing faith in others goes beyond bolstering individual confidence; it also strengthens interpersonal bonds and cultivates deeper connections.

Related: 18 little habits to start doing now to be ahead of everyone else in 10 years

18) “We all make mistakes” 

This phrase brings us together, recognizing that everyone makes mistakes and fostering a forgiving and empathetic environment

Words hold immense power, and when we string them together in such a phrase, they can even ease challenging feelings of guilt or shame. 

So, when offering comfort to someone who has made a mistake, a simple statement like, “We all make mistakes. What truly matters is how we learn and grow from them,” can make a significant impact.

19) “Thank you for understanding”

Appreciating flexibility and understanding in others shows gratitude and emotional intelligence

After rescheduling a meeting, you could express, “Thank you for understanding and accommodating the change.”

20) “Let’s move forward” 

Emphasizing progress over dwelling on past mistakes displays resilience and a solution-oriented mindset. 

After resolving a conflict, you might say, “Let’s move forward and focus on our common goals.”

In a nutshell, using these phrases appropriately demonstrates an understanding of emotional intelligence in different contexts. 

They reflect empathy, self-awareness, social awareness, and relationship management – the key components of emotional intelligence. 

Incorporate these phrases into your daily conversations, and you’ll see the profound impact they can have on your relationships and personal growth.

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