If someone uses these 15 phrases, they’re a great conversationalist

by Isabel Cabrera | December 20, 2023, 8:23 pm

Ever been stuck in a conversation feeling like you’re being talked at instead of talked with? We’ve all been there. 

But then there are those chats where time flies, and you walk away feeling heard, understood, and valued. 

What sets those fantastic conversationalists apart?

It’s not magic or charisma. It’s the art of using the right phrases.

In this article, I’ll help you explore 15 tell-tale phrases of a masterful conversationalist.

1) “What’s your perspective on…?”

Let’s be honest: it’s not that hard to share your thoughts with someone else. 

But only if you want to have a small talk.

So, how do you invite someone into a deeper dialogue? 

Asking, “What’s your perspective on…?” opens the door wide. 

This question shows they care about what you think. It means they think your views are unique and valuable.

Imagine you’re discussing climate change. This phrase encourages them to share not just facts but feelings, philosophies, and maybe even fears. 

Interested in an authentic connection? This is your gateway phrase.

That’s pretty cool, right?

2) “I’d love to hear more about your experience with…”

Ever been in a chat where you just scratched the surface? Like talking about a movie you saw or a place you went to? 

Now, imagine someone saying, “Tell me more about that movie” or “How was that place?”. 

I bet this would sound impressive.

The thing is that this phrase means they want to hear the full story, not just the headline. 

That’s why I can assure you that this simple phrase is an instant rapport-builder. 

It means you’ve moved beyond merely acknowledging someone’s statement to showing genuine interest in their life. 

3) “What led you to that conclusion?”

How many times have you wondered how someone arrived at a particular belief or decision? 

Probably, a lot. That’s because we’re curious creatures. But you know what?

This question isn’t just curiosity — it’s a masterclass in empathy. 

It allows you to walk a mile in their mental shoes. 

You’re essentially saying, “Show me the path you took; I want to understand you better.” 

It’s like asking for the recipe behind their signature dish of thoughts. 

The best part about this question?

People love that. They feel seen. Valued. Next time you chat, slip this question in. See how the chat deepens. How it becomes more real.

4) “It’s interesting you say that because…”

Picture this: you’re talking about your favorite singer. 

Out of the blue, someone says, “That’s cool. I heard a fun fact about them.” 

What happens next? 

The chat just got more exciting. 

Here’s the thing:

This phrase honors their viewpoint while gently introducing your own. 

And whenever people use it, they’re adding to the conversation and making it better. They’re not just there for the chat; they’re a part of it.

Ever had a moment when someone added a surprising twist to your story? That’s what this phrase accomplishes.

5) “Could you elaborate on that point?”

Did you know our brains are naturally wired to seek complete stories? 

Well, that could be the reason why great conversationalists love to use this phrase.

The truth is that we want to fill in the blanks. And this phrase does precisely that. 

It’s a polite way of saying, “I’m hooked. Give me more.” It lets the other person open up, share more, and really paint the picture. 

By asking them to elaborate, you’re not only feeding your brain’s desire for completeness, but you’re also deepening the bond between you two. 

So whenever you sense there’s more to the tale, don’t hesitate — ask for the whole story.

6) “Thanks for sharing that with me.”

We’ve all felt the warmth when someone genuinely appreciates our thoughts, right?

Here’s the deal: it’s a game-changer.

Saying, “Thanks for sharing that with me” is so simple, yet profound. 

It’s raw gratitude. No frills. No fluff. 

But wait, there’s more: it tells the other person, “You matter. Your story matters.” 

You see, we all have moments where we wonder: does anyone truly care about what I have to say? 

This phrase is the answer. 

It’s the tiny gesture that says, “I’m listening. I’m here. I value you.”

7) “I really value your insight on this.”

Ever found yourself nodding along in a conversation, genuinely wowed by someone’s take on a topic? 

Admit it. We all have.

Picture this: you’re diving deep into a conversation about a favorite book, and you give an interpretation that’s straight from your heart.

And then they say, “I really value your insight on this.”

Well, that’s a power move in the art of conversation.

You see, this phrase isn’t just a casual compliment. It’s an acknowledgment. A nod to the depth and weight of your thoughts.

8) “I understand where you’re coming from.”

This line is the equivalent of giving someone a verbal hug. 

Why?

Because it wraps them in warmth and understanding.

In simple terms, this phrase means you’re acknowledging their feelings or viewpoints without necessarily agreeing or disagreeing. 

Let me say, it’s the conversational form of ‘Namaste’: I honor the place in you where the entire universe resides.

It’s more than just words. It’s an emotional lifeline.

It’s about making someone feel seen, heard, and above all, understood. 

9) “What would you do in that situation?”

After detailing a tricky scenario you faced, someone leans in and pops this question. What’s happening here?

They’re not just passively listening; they’re getting into the heart of the matter.

By asking “What would you do in that situation?”, they’re rolling out a red carpet for your thoughts and decisions. 

They’re curious about your problem-solving techniques or the emotions that drive your decisions. 

This means you’re no longer just sharing ideas — you’re requesting wisdom. 

Think of it as them handing you a road map of their mind and saying, “Here’s a route I’d consider.”

So, remember: if someone mentions this phrase while having a dialogue with you, they’re curious about your problem-solving techniques or the emotions that drive your decisions.

10) “Have you considered…?”

Speaking of decision-making, it’s not always easy. We can get stuck in our own thoughts.

But “Have you considered…?” is like giving someone a fresh pair of eyes. 

It offers a new way to look at things.

Imagine you’re facing a tough choice. You’ve thought about it a lot. Then a friend asks, “Have you considered this?” 

Suddenly, you see a new option.

It’s not about doubting someone’s thoughts. It’s about helping. It’s about saying, “Let’s think together.”

11) “I’ve never heard it put quite that way.”

Let’s face it; we all like to be seen as unique, right?

When you offer a fresh take on a topic, and someone says, “I’ve never heard it put quite that way,” it’s a nod to your originality.

They’re not just passively taking in what you say. This means they’re highlighting the novelty and depth of your perspective

In simple words, it’s their way of celebrating the individual colors you bring to the canvas of conversation. 

If someone uses this phrase with you, trust me, they’re genuinely admiring the unique flavor you add to the chat.

12) “What’s the story behind that viewpoint?”

Every thought has a story. And this phrase dives right into it.

It’s like asking, “What journey brought you here?” Because let’s be real, our beliefs and views? 

They come from somewhere.

Maybe it’s from an old book, a chat with grandma, or just life lessons. And when someone asks about it, they’re digging deeper. They’re really getting to know you.

So, next time you’re curious, just ask. You might uncover a tale worth hearing.

13) “Imagine explaining that to a child; how would you phrase it?”

Breaking things down can be tricky. But this phrase is a fun challenge.

It’s saying, “Let’s make it simple.” 

How does it work?

Well, if you can explain something to a kid, you truly understand it.

The best part is that phrase is both playful and insightful. 

It forces them to distill their complex thoughts into simple language, offering you—and them—a crystal-clear understanding.

14) “How did that make you feel?”

I can’t deny: feelings are at the heart of every story. And this question goes straight to the core.

When you ask, “How did that make you feel?”, you’re diving deeper.

Past the events, right into the emotions.

Maybe someone tells you about a big win at work. This question asks, “Were you thrilled? Relieved? Maybe even a bit scared?”

It’s a bridge to understanding emotions

And when you ask it, you’re saying, “I care. Not just about the story, but about you.” It’s a beautiful way to connect, one feeling at a time.

15) “I’m genuinely curious: have you ever felt the opposite way?”

After delving into emotions with our last point, it’s essential to remember: we’re all full of contrasts.

You see, we humans are complex. Today we might feel one way, and tomorrow? 

Completely different.

The reason is that emotions aren’t static. They fade away and flow. 

Asking, “I’m genuinely curious: have you ever felt the opposite way?” is a way of exploring those layers. It’s like asking someone to flip a coin and show the other side.

And that’s the beauty of our human experience.

When someone asks, “I’m genuinely curious: have you ever felt the opposite way?” they’re peeling back another layer. 

This question opens the door to exploring paradoxes, contradictions, and growth.

Final thoughts

As you can see, having a great conversation isn’t just about speaking but also about truly connecting. 

Each of these phrases is a bridge, inviting deeper understanding and genuine interest. 

So why settle for small talk when you could be crafting soulful dialogue? 

Try these phrases in your next conversation, and remember: It’s the quality of your words, not the quantity, that truly matters.

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