10 psychological tricks to make someone instantly trust you

Trust is typically a thing that’s earned over time, rather than granted with ease.

But there are subtle things you can do to speed up the process.

In fact, once you know the psychology behind how people think, you can win almost anyone over with a few simple tricks!

Once you’ve gained someone’s trust, you can build a better, stronger, more meaningful relationship with them.

Whether it’s an interview panel, a new boss, a friend of a friend, or a partner’s parent – there are a ton of benefits for you in winning their trust early doors.

Want to know the secrets to make someone instantly trust you?

Up first:

1) Smile and greet them warmly

First impressions matter. I know you hear that all the time, but it has to make the list because it’s true!

Research shows it takes just 7 seconds to form an opinion of someone we first meet. As you know, that’s hardly enough time to do anything!

Except for two things: smiling and saying hello.

How you greet someone forms almost their entire first impression of you.

Your clothing, posture, appearance, and overall demeanor also make the list – but some would argue they aren’t as important as how you make people feel.

So if you want someone to instantly trust you, make yourself look trustworthy!

Give them a big smile, greet them warmly, shake their hand firmly, and make them feel seen.

It wouldn’t hurt to make yourself look presentable, too – with clean clothes and neatly styled hair.

2) Look them in the eye

Averting someone’s gaze is the worst way to gain someone’s trust.

Imagine talking to someone who keeps looking over your shoulder, down at their feet, or at the walls around you.

They’d look shifty, right?

Having strong eye contact is the best way to form and improve relationships with people. It works with people you don’t know (like interviewers and new friends) and people you already have a slight relationship with (like your boss or coworker).

Experts even say that good eye contact increases the respect and trust people have in you – especially in a work setting.

So if you want someone to trust you, holding their gaze is a good place to start.

3) Mirror their body language

Mirroring is one of the oldest tricks in the book to get someone to trust you.

The psychology behind it is that when you mirror someone’s body language, you signal that you feel connected to them.

You also signal that you empathize with them, trust them, and like them as a person.

You can mirror someone in all kinds of ways. Most people opt for mirroring vocal tones or facial expressions when they meet someone new.

Like smiling, frowning, or raising eyebrows in surprise when the other person does the same.

Other ways you can mimic behavior are to cross your legs, fold your arms, sit back, or stand up when the other person does it.

Just be careful you don’t make your mirroring too obvious!

There’s nothing worse than having someone think you’re mocking them or mirroring their actions intentionally (even though you definitely are!).

4) Talk slowly

Imagine two people present on a topic. One speaks super-fast, while the other takes their time. Which one are you more likely to listen to?

I bet it’s the second!

Talking quickly is a sign that you’re excited or nervous. When it’s the latter, I know from experience that it’s hard to focus on what the person is saying. All I’m doing is thinking about how nervous they are!

But when you talk slowly and clearly, people are more inclined to listen. It gives off a sense of authority and can even make what you’re saying seem more credible.

I.e., it makes you seem that little bit more trustworthy!

So talk a little slower if you want people to trust you, listen to you, and see you as a bit of an authority figure.

5) Be validating

People love to be validated. To have a healthy mindset, we should validate ourselves. But it’s also important to get some external validation.

Validation occurs when you give someone recognition for something they did and make them feel worthy.

Say a friend gives a presentation at work. Afterward, I tell her she did a great job and presented everything really well.

Sure, she could tell herself that and feel good about how it went. But me validating her on it gives her that little bit of extra confidence.

Plus, experts say my validating her actions makes her trust me more.

6) Be a little vulnerable

Opening up is a thing most people find difficult. Generally, people only like opening up to people they know and trust.

Which is why it feels like a big deal when someone opens up to you. If you’ve ever experienced this before, you’ll know what I mean.

When someone you hardly know decides to share something personal with you, you feel honored and trusted.

And because you feel so good about it, your good feelings extend to this person, too. Because they trust you, so you want to trust them in return.

So try lightly bringing up your bad experiences. Don’t trauma dump onto them or share too much. If anything, you want to leave them wanting a little bit more!

But sharing little snippets of personal information about yourself, your weaknesses, and past bad experiences can go a long way in winning their trust quickly.

7) Ask for advice

Think about a time when you’ve needed advice. Chances are, you’ll ask a good friend, right? A person you trust will listen to you and say something helpful?

And, on the flip side, when someone asks you for advice, you feel like they trust you in return, right?

This is known as the Franklin Effect.

Which is otherwise known as the illusion of trust that’s created when you ask someone for help. It makes them like you and want to help.

So if you want to gain someone’s instant trust, give it a go asking for some light-hearted advice.

This trick is best used on coworkers or classmates. In these situations, it’s pretty normal to ask for advice without coming across as too strong!

But you can also do it with a new friend, a friend of a friend, or after a couple of dates with someone if you want to gain their trust quickly.

8) Create a little sympathy

Another psychological trick you can use to get someone to instantly trust you is to create a little bit of sympathy for yourself.

You can do this by being a little vulnerable (see above). Or by asking for advice (also see above). Or you can do it in another way…by creating a little sympathy for yourself!

Like telling them a (mini) sob story about how unwell you feel. Or about how bad of a day you’ve already had.

When you do this, most people’s protective instincts kick in. They want to help and look after you.

They also see it as a sign that you trust them. Which, in turn, can make them trust you more themselves.

9) Give reassurance

Just like validation, a little reassurance goes a long way in making people like and trust you.

When you give reassurance, you create a safe space for the other person to talk, express their feelings, and be themselves.

Take my boyfriend, for example. When we first met, we were talking about a town we both lived in once. He asked why I didn’t live there anymore. I went a bit quiet.

“It’s OK if it was with an ex, we all have a past,” he rushed out.

At that moment, he offered me all the reassurance I needed to feel safe talking to him about things in my life. And it immediately created some trust in him!

So offer someone a little reassurance when they hesitate or hold back. It could give them all the trust they need in you to continue speaking.

10) Establish common ground

The final trick to make someone instantly trust you is to establish some common ground.

It works best if you bring up mutual friends, particularly if they like this person. When you do this, their trust in that person automatically extends to you a little bit.

It’s called triadic closure, which is the phenomenon where two people are more likely to be close and trust each other when they have a mutual friend.

It can also work if you bring up shared interests, career pursuits, hobbies, or even places you’ve traveled. It gives you something to talk about and bond over.

Both of which can make them like and trust you that little bit more!

Final thoughts

Remember – there’s only so much you can do early doors to gain someone’s trust.

Once you’ve got your “in”, you need to continue being integral to maintain their trust.

Otherwise, they could slowly start to lose faith in you.

And when the trust in you is gone, it’s very difficult to get it back!