Parents who have the closest relationships with their adult children do these 8 things early on
When you see a parent and their adult child sharing a laugh, you can tell they’re close; when you see them comfort each other in tough times, you know they have a deep bond.
But how does this happen? What’s the secret sauce?
Well, the human relationship is a tricky thing, especially when it comes to the parent-child dynamic.
It’s not always as simple as it seems from the outside.
However, there are parents who just seem to get it right—that’s usually because they’ve been doing these eight things from the early days:
1) They communicate openly and honestly
Communication is the key—it’s as simple and as complicated as that.
In any relationship, it’s important to express your thoughts and feelings.
However, when it comes to the parent-child dynamic, this becomes even more crucial.
Parents who build the strongest relationships with their adult children usually start off by fostering an environment of open and honest communication from an early stage.
They don’t shy away from discussing difficult topics or sharing their own emotions; they encourage their children to do the same, creating a safe space where everyone feels heard and understood.
This not only strengthens their bond, but also forms the foundation for emotional intelligence in their children.
It’s not just about talking as it’s also about listening and understanding what your child has to say.
That’s what makes these parents different—they don’t just speak, they truly communicate.
2) They nurture independence
Building a strong relationship doesn’t mean being overly attached or controlling, quite the opposite.
I remember growing up, my parents always encouraged me to make my own decisions.
From little things like choosing my clothes for school to bigger ones like selecting a university major, they were there to guide me but never imposed their choices.
They understood the importance of nurturing independence and allowing me to learn from my own mistakes.
This not only helped me grow as an individual but also fostered a deep sense of trust and respect between us.
Fast forward to today, and our relationship couldn’t be stronger.
We still have our disagreements, but the mutual respect we cultivated over the years allows us to navigate these bumps smoothly.
If you want to build a close relationship with your adult children, let them spread their wings early on.
3) They practice consistent discipline
Discipline is a word that often carries negative connotations, but it’s a crucial part of parenting.
It doesn’t mean being harsh or punitive; it simply means setting clear boundaries and expectations for behaviour.
Consistency in discipline helps children understand what is acceptable and what isn’t, forming the foundation for their moral compass.
Children who experience consistent discipline are more likely to grow into well-adjusted adults.
Discipline isn’t about control, though, it’s about teaching responsibility and respect.
It’s about helping your child understand the consequences of their actions, just like a good editor helps an author see the impact of their words on the reader.
4) They spend quality time together

Time is the most precious gift you can give to your child, and parents who have close relationships with their adult children understand this well.
It’s not about the quantity but the quality of the time spent together.
Whether it’s playing a game, reading a book, or just sitting down for a chat over dinner, these moments can leave lasting impressions.
These parents know that being present and engaged during these times is what truly matters.
It’s not about merely being in the same room, but actively participating and showing genuine interest in their child’s life.
These shared experiences, no matter how trivial they may seem, help forge strong bonds that last well into adulthood.
5) They lead by example
Children are like sponges, they soak up everything around them, especially when it comes to their parents’ actions.
I always try to remember this in my own parenting journey; I know my child is watching and learning from me.
So, I make a conscious effort to model the values and behaviours I want her to adopt.
Whether it’s showing kindness to others, being diligent in my work, or even admitting when I’m wrong, I try to set an example.
It’s not always easy, and I do slip up sometimes.
That’s okay because it’s all part of the process.
Leading by example is like showing them a blueprint of how to navigate life.
6) They allow disagreements
Disagreements are often seen as a negative aspect of a relationship, but they don’t have to be.
Parents who enjoy close relationships with their adult children understand the value of allowing disagreements.
They see these instances not as threats to their relationship, but as opportunities for growth and understanding.
Instead of suppressing differing opinions and creating a false harmony, they encourage open debate.
They respect their child’s viewpoint, even if it doesn’t align with their own.
This approach teaches the child to express their thoughts without fear of rejection or judgment.
It’s like proofreading a document—sometimes you need to highlight the errors and disagreements to create a better final product.
The next time you find yourself in a disagreement with your child, remember it could be an opportunity to strengthen your bond rather than weaken it.
7) They express love and appreciation
It might seem obvious, but expressing love and appreciation plays a significant role in building strong parent-child relationships.
Parents who share close bonds with their adult children are often those who aren’t afraid to demonstrate their love, both in words and actions.
They make it a point to tell their children how much they mean to them and appreciate them for who they are.
These expressions of love go beyond the usual ‘I love you’—they’re about acknowledging the child’s efforts, praising their achievements, and showing genuine interest in their lives.
Much like the final touch-ups on a written piece that make it shine, these small expressions of love and appreciation can truly enhance the parent-child relationship.
They leave a lasting impression, one that continues to strengthen the bond over the years.
8) They respect their adult children’s autonomy
Respecting your child’s autonomy is perhaps the most crucial aspect of building a close relationship with them as adults.
These parents understand that their children are individuals with their own dreams, goals, and desires.
They respect their decisions and give them the space they need to live their own lives; they offer advice when asked but refrain from interfering unnecessarily.
Likewise, they also recognize that while their role as a parent never ends, it does evolve as their child grows into adulthood.
This respect for autonomy strengthens the bond between parent and child, fostering mutual respect and understanding.
It allows for a relationship that is not bound by obligation, but fueled by genuine love and respect.
Reflections on the journey of parenthood
If you’ve made it to this point in the article, it’s clear that you’re invested in fostering a strong, enduring relationship with your adult children.
Being a parent is about understanding their world, respecting their individuality, and being there for them as they navigate life’s many twists and turns.
Building close relationships with your children doesn’t happen overnight.
It’s a lifelong journey filled with moments of joy, challenges, learning, and growth.
As we close this discussion, reflect on these eight points and consider how they can be incorporated into your parenting approach.
After all, establishing a close bond with your children is one of the most rewarding experiences life has to offer.
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