10 signs you’re in the right relationship, even if it doesn’t feel like it

by Brendan Brown | June 18, 2024, 9:49 am

So, you’re in a relationship with someone. That’s great! But occasionally, you might find yourself wondering, “Is this person right for me?”

Don’t worry, you’re not alone in this. We all have those doubts sometimes. And the truth is, love isn’t always like what we see in the movies.

Sometimes, love is about the little things – shared laughs, understanding each other, and being there  for each otherduring tough times.

So how can you tell if you’re in the right relationship? There are signs to look out for!

Let’s talk about 10 signs that show you’re in the right relationship, even if it doesn’t feel like it.

1. You can be yourself

This is the first and arguably one of the most important signs. In the right relationship, you should feel free to be your authentic self, quirks and all.

Have you ever found yourself toning down your personality around certain people?

Well, in a relationship that’s right for you, there’s no need for that. You can be goofy, serious, wild, or reserved. Basically, you can be *you*.

Your partner should love you for who you are and not who they want you to be. So if your significant other embraces your quirks, encourages your passions, and loves your authenticity, that’s a fabulous sign.

2. They’re your biggest cheerleader

Having support in a relationship is vital. If your partner is your biggest cheerleader and always has your back, you’re in a good place.

Let’s say you got a promotion at work, or you’re starting a new hobby – does your partner celebrate your successes and encourage your interests? Or take it the other way, if you’ve had a rough day or things didn’t go as planned, are they there to lift your spirits and provide comfort?

A supportive partner isn’t just there for the good times. They stick by you through ups and downs. They listen, understand, and offer help when needed.

So if your partner is the first one to applaud your wins, big or small, and the first one to offer a shoulder to lean on during tough times, that’s sign number two that you’re in the right relationship.

And there’s more to come…

3. Respects your boundaries

Respecting boundaries is a bedrock of a healthy relationship. It’s about understanding and accepting that there are certain lines which should not be crossed.

I’m an introvert by nature and after a long day of socializing or just too much ‘people time’, I need some alone time to recharge. My partner, on the other hand, is a total extrovert.

Initially, this led to some misunderstanding.

However, after discussing our differences, my partner now respects my need for solitude. She understands that it’s not about her; it’s just how I recharge. She doesn’t take it personally and gives me the space I need without making me feel guilty about it.

In a right relationship, your partner will respect your boundaries. They’ll understand that ‘no’ means ‘no’, without trying to persuade or guilt you into changing your mind.

If your partner respects your boundaries just like mine does, you’re in the right place!

4. You share core values

This is a big one! Sharing core values forms the foundation of a strong, lasting relationship.

Now, you might be thinking, “We’re polar opposites in many ways!” But hold on, I’m not talking about having the same coffee order in the mornong or both loving the same movie.

This is about your basic beliefs about life, your principles, and what you consider right and wrong.

For instance, you might have different hobbies but share a common ground on wanting kids or valuing honesty above all else. These are the values that guide your decisions and behaviors in life.

According to a study, couples who share similar values are more likely to stay together in the long run than those who don’t.

So if you and your partner share the same core values, that’s another sign you’re in the right relationship. 

5. They make you feel loved

In the right relationship, love isn’t just a word; it’s a feeling that’s constantly present, even in the smallest of actions.

Imagine this – you’ve had an exhausting day at work. You come home to find your favorite meal cooked to perfection, a hot bath running, and your partner waiting to give you a massage.

Isn’t that love?

But love isn’t just about grand gestures or material gifts. It’s about those little moments when your partner looks at you like you’re the only person in the room. 

Love is about feeling safe and secure in their arms, knowing that they’ll always be there for you. 

If your partner makes you feel loved and special every single day – in big ways and small – then you’re definitely in the right relationship.

6. You trust each other completely

Trust is the backbone of any relationship. Without it, you’re building on shaky ground.

Last year, I had to travel for work for about a month. It was the longest time my partner and I had spent apart since we started dating. While I was away, we kept in touch through calls and messages, of course, but it wasn’t the same as being together.

In that situation, it would’ve been easy for either of us to get suspicious or insecure. But we didn’t. We trusted each other completely.

Even when I was in a different time zone, busy and unable to communicate as much as usual, there was never a seed of doubt in my partner’s mind (or in mine) about each other’s commitment.

This level of trust didn’t develop overnight, of course. It came from years of honesty, openness, and loyalty.

It’s about knowing that your partner will keep their promises and always be there for you.

If you trust your partner as much as they trust you, that’s yet another sign you’re in the right relationship.

7. You fight, but you also forgive

Alright, let’s get real here. Every couple fights. Yes, EVERY couple.

If someone tells you they’re in a relationship where there’s never been a disagreement or a heated moment, they’re probably not telling the whole truth.

Disagreements are natural because no two people are the same. You have your own thoughts, feelings, and opinions, and so does your partner. And sometimes, those opinions clash.

What matters is how you handle these fights.

Do you listen to each other’s point of view? Do you communicate your feelings honestly? Most importantly, do you forgive each other?

In the right relationship, fights don’t mean the end of the world. They’re just bumps on the road.

After a disagreement, you should be able to make up, forgive each other, and move on, without holding grudges.

If you can do that, then your relationship is in a good place. 

8. You share laughter

A good laugh can heal a lot of hurts, as they say, and this is particularly true in relationships. Sharing a sense of humor with your partner can be a powerful bond.

It’s not just about cracking jokes all the time. It’s about finding joy and laughter in each other’s company.

Whether it’s laughing at each other’s silly mistakes, inside jokes, or just laughing together while watching a funny movie – these moments contribute to the joy in your relationship.

So if you and your partner share laughter and joy, take that as another sign you’re in the right relationship.

9. You feel secure

Feeling secure in a relationship is one of those things that you might not notice until it’s gone.

But when you have it, it’s a wonderful thing.

In my previous relationships, there was always this nagging feeling of uncertainty. Doubts would creep in about whether we were truly right for each other, or if they were as committed as I was.

However, with my current partner, it’s different. There’s a sense of security that I haven’t felt before.

I know she’s committed to our relationship just as much as I am. There’s no second-guessing or constant need for reassurances.

If you feel secure and certain about your partner and your relationship, you’re in the right place

10. Your happiness is their happiness

The final sign is perhaps the most telling of all. In the right relationship, your partner’s happiness is as important to you as your own, and vice versa.

This isn’t about sacrificing your own happiness for the sake of your partner’s. It’s about finding joy in seeing them happy. It’s about making compromises and sometimes going out of your way to bring a smile to their face.

Similarly, in the right relationship, your partner will value your happiness too. They’ll celebrate your victories with you, comfort you in your sorrows, and do their best to make you smile.

If seeing your partner happy makes you happy and if they feel the same way about you, then that’s a pretty clear sign that you’re in the right relationship.

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