Are you a lone wolf? 11 signs you’re someone who enjoys being alone

by Brendan Brown | January 12, 2024, 12:20 pm

Humans are social animals. And it’s our cooperative nature that has made us the creatures we are today.

But not everyone enjoys the company of others. Some people are just as happy being alone.

That’s not a bad thing. In fact, people with a lone wolf personality are often some of the strongest and most independent people you’ll ever meet.

If you’ve ever wondered if you are a natural loner, here are some signs that can demonstrate that you are happiest in solitude.

1) You like doing things your way

Take it from someone who’s a natural loner. One of the best things about spending time alone is that you get to do things your way.

I’m not saying that being by yourself is always better than being with other people. But I am saying that one of the biggest perks of spending time alone is that you can do exactly what you want without worrying about what other people think.

You can watch the TV shows you like. You can play video games all day if you want. You can eat the food you want, and wear what you want – including nothing at all.

Spending time around other people inevitably means compromise. And while there’s nothing wrong with that, it’s nice to have your own way sometimes.

If you’re the kind of person who likes to do things your way, there’s a good chance you prefer spending a lot of time alone.

2) You aren’t interested in small talk

Small talk may be more important than it seems. It’s a way for people to socialize and make conversation without getting into deep topics, and it may have had an important role in the evolution of human society.

That doesn’t mean you have to like it.

Do you find yourself bored with the things most people talk about? Whether it’s sports, popular TV programs, or the weather, you may find the usual small talk topics incredibly boring.

Perhaps you even prefer silence to empty talk.

If so, there is a very good chance that you are a natural loner.

3) You enjoy solitary activities

What are your favorite things to do? Because sometimes, your preferred activities can give a glimpse into your personality.

Perhaps you enjoy watching films. Maybe you like to read. Or maybe you enjoy outdoor solo activities such as hiking, fishing, or paddleboarding.

You have no problem being alone, and actually prefer the sense of serenity and independence you get from pursuing solo activities.

If that’s the case, you’re probably a lone wolf.

4) You aren’t afraid of silence

I already mentioned a distaste for small talk. And part of the reason loners dislike small talk so much is because they have no problem with silence.

For some of us, it’s better to sit in silence than to talk about uninteresting topics.

That doesn’t mean you never want to talk at all. It’s quite possible you have some deep thoughts and would love to have a deep conversation about them.

Unfortunately, most people aren’t as interested in weighty topics as you.

And if you can’t talk about something meaningful, you’re just as comfortable not talking about anything at all.

5) You travel alone

 Solo travel isn’t for everyone. But some people absolutely thrive when traveling alone.

Maybe you’re an experienced solo traveler. Perhaps you’ve never tried it for yourself, but have always thought about it. Either way, it’s a good sign that you are a lone wolf.

Speaking personally, some of the best vacations I’ve ever taken have been by myself. I love exploring a new place on my own and doing exactly what I want to do without worrying about what anybody else thinks about it.

If that sounds like paradise to you, maybe it’s because you, too, are a natural-born loner.

6) You have interesting thoughts

We all have different definitions of what is interesting and what isn’t. What matters is that you find your own thoughts interesting.

Often, people who like to be alone are relentlessly curious about the world around them. They love to learn, and their highly active brains feed on new information and ideas.

If that’s the case, you probably have no problem being alone because you can keep yourself entertained with your own thoughts.

Plus, being away from other people gives you the space you need to develop your ideas and really get some thinking done.

If that sounds like you, you’re probably a true loner.

7) You are decisive

Some people have a hard time making decisions for themselves. They prefer to seek consensus and like to know that other people approve of their choices.

That isn’t you, though.

You have no problem making decisions, especially when you are the only one affected by the choices you make. You know what you want, and you have no problem making even the tough decisions it takes to get it.

If so, you probably cherish your alone time.

8) You find notifications annoying

These days, we all carry the world with us wherever we go in the form of our cell phones. And depending on the apps you use, you may find yourself inundated throughout the day by notifications from one service or another.

Some people thrive on that kind of constant connection. But other people find it intensely irritating.

If you often find yourself wishing you got fewer notifications or have taken steps to delete a lot of your social media, it may well be because you are a loner.

9) You aren’t interested in gossip

Gossip is some people’s favorite thing to do. Even half the news these days is little more than gossip about celebrities and other people you’ll never meet.

For some people, nothing is more fun than gossiping about others. And while gossip can have harmful effects, it can also be relatively innocent when it’s just a method of passing the time.

But not everyone is interested. For some people, there’s nothing more boring than the latest gossip, whether it’s about famous people or about your own acquaintances.

Being uninterested in gossip doesn’t mean you don’t care about other people. But it does mean you aren’t interested in idle chitchat or in talking about people behind their backs.

And it may also mean that you are a loner.

10) You don’t care much what other people think

Often, people with lone wolf behaviors have a very strong sense of self. That means that they are satisfied with who they are and don’t need validation from other people.

One consequence of that is not caring much what other people think.

Here’s why: the less you care about what others think of you, the more likely you are to do your own thing.

And because you are uninterested in other people’s opinions, it’s much more likely that you will live in an unconventional way or be willing to spend time alone.

Some people waste their whole lives trying to live the way others think they should. But if you are immune to that kind of social pressure, congratulations. You’re probably much happier spending time by yourself.

11) You don’t have time for superficial friendships

Being a lone wolf often overlaps with being an introvert, but they are not necessarily the same thing.

And it’s not true that lone wolves don’t have any friends. In fact, they often have very deep and meaningful relationships with others.

On the other hand, they usually don’t have a lot of superficial friendships.

Do you prefer having a few intensely meaningful relationships over having a bunch of friends you can’t really rely on? Would you rather get to know a few people very well than be vaguely familiar with dozens?

If so, you may be the type of person who thrives in solitude. After all, it’s often better to be completely by yourself than to waste your time with people who don’t truly care about you.

The lone wolf type

It would be a very boring world if we were all the same. And although people sometimes don’t understand those with a lone wolf personality, people who are comfortable being alone are often some of the most interesting people around.

If you are perfectly comfortable spending time by yourself, it doesn’t make you strange. It just means you’re the type of person who thrives on solitude, and that can be a great thing to be.

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