8 things people with strong social instincts always do when meeting someone for the first time

by Tina Fey | August 26, 2025, 10:02 am

Navigating social situations can feel like a minefield. But for some, it’s as easy as breathing. These people have what we call strong social instincts.

Meeting someone for the first time can be especially tricky. It’s a delicate dance of first impressions and unspoken cues.

But those with solid social instincts know how to handle these encounters effortlessly. They have certain habits or actions they always do when meeting someone new.

In this article, I’ll be sharing 8 things these socially savvy individuals always do when introduced to someone for the first time. Spoiler alert: It’s not as complicated as you might think, and with a bit of practice, you too can master these skills.

1) They remember names

It’s said that the sweetest sound in any language for a person is their own name.

Those with strong social instincts understand this principle well. When they meet someone for the first time, they make it a point to remember and use the person’s name in conversation.

This simple act serves a dual purpose. It not only shows respect and interest towards the other person, but it also helps to build a connection quickly.

And here’s a pro tip: if you struggle with remembering names, try to use it as soon as possible in your conversation. For instance, “Nice to meet you, John. So, John, what brings you here today?”

This habit is not about being clever or deceptive. On the contrary, it shows genuine interest in the person you’re talking to and helps lay the foundation for a positive relationship.

Whether you’re an academic at a seminar, a novelist at a book launch, or a business professional at an industry event – remembering names can set the tone for all future interactions. So make it a priority!

2) They maintain eye contact

One thing I’ve noticed about people with strong social instincts is their mastery of non-verbal communication. It’s not just about what they say, but how they say it. And a key part of this is maintaining eye contact.

Now, I’m not talking about an intense, unblinking stare that makes the other person uncomfortable. No, it’s a steady, warm gaze that communicates interest and attention.

I remember meeting a renowned author at a book signing event once. The line was long, and she had been signing books and greeting fans for hours.

But when my turn came, she looked me straight in the eyes as I introduced myself. In that moment, it felt like I was the only person in that room.

That’s the power of eye contact. It can make someone feel seen and heard in a crowded room. And people with strong social instincts know how to use it to create an instant connection.

Next time you meet someone new, try to consciously maintain eye contact with them. It might feel strange at first, especially if you’re not used to it. But trust me, it makes a significant difference in how your interaction flows.

3) They mirror body language

Mirroring, or subtly copying the physical gestures and posture of the person you’re interacting with, is a powerful tool in social situations. It builds rapport and shows empathy without verbally saying anything.

Research has shown that people are more likely to feel comfortable and positively towards someone who mirrors their body language. It’s a subconscious signal that says, “I’m like you, and I understand you.”

People with strong social instincts do this naturally when meeting someone for the first time. If you’re crossing your arms, they might do the same. If you lean in while speaking, they’ll mirror that too.

This isn’t about mimicking or mocking. It’s about subtly communicating that you’re on the same wavelength. And if done correctly, it can turn a first-time meeting into a positive connection in no time.

4) They ask open-ended questions

Ever met someone who makes you feel like you’re the most interesting person in the room? Chances are, they were probably very good at asking open-ended questions.

People with strong social instincts know the value of a good question. Not yes or no inquiries, but questions that invite the other person to share more about themselves.

Instead of asking, “Do you like your job?” they might ask, “What do you enjoy most about your work?” That small tweak can transform a potential dead-end answer into a conversation opener.

Asking open-ended questions gives the other person a chance to express themselves. It shows that you’re interested in their thoughts and feelings, not just ticking off a checklist of small talk topics.

Plus, it’s a great way to learn more about the person you’re speaking with, which could be useful for future interactions.

5) They show genuine interest

In a world where most of us are constantly distracted, being sincerely interested in someone can feel like a breath of fresh air.

People with strong social instincts know this. When they meet someone for the first time, they are genuinely interested in learning more about them, their experiences, and their perspectives.

It’s not about feigning interest to win people over, but about truly valuing the interaction and the opportunity to learn something new.

I believe that every person has a unique story to tell, and listening to those stories with genuine interest can not only enrich our own lives but also make others feel valued and seen.

So, the next time you meet someone new, take a moment to really be present in the conversation. Ask about their day, their interests, their dreams, and really listen to their answers.

6) They are comfortable with silence

Silence can be uncomfortable for many of us. When I was younger, I used to feel the need to fill every lull in the conversation with words, often leading to unnecessary chatter or forced topics.

Over time, however, I’ve learned to appreciate the power of silence. It gives people time to think, to process what’s been said, and to gather their thoughts before responding.

People with strong social instincts are comfortable with these moments of silence. They understand that quality conversations often require pauses and that silence doesn’t necessarily mean awkwardness.

So next time you’re meeting someone for the first time and there’s a lull in the conversation, don’t rush to fill it. Allow the silence to exist. You might find that it leads to deeper and more meaningful conversations.

7) They display positive body language

Body language speaks volumes about a person’s feelings and attitudes. It’s a non-verbal form of communication that people with strong social instincts use effectively when meeting someone for the first time.

A warm smile, relaxed posture, and open gestures all signal to the other person that you are friendly and open to conversation. These actions can help to put the other person at ease and pave the way for a positive interaction.

In contrast, crossed arms, a furrowed brow, or constant checking of your phone can give off an impression of disinterest or hostility, even if that’s not your intention.

So, be mindful of your body language in social situations. It’s an important tool in creating a positive first impression and establishing a connection with others.

8) They are authentic

Above all, people with strong social instincts are genuine. When they meet someone for the first time, they aren’t trying to portray an image or impress with grandiose stories. They present their true selves, with all their strengths and flaws.

Authenticity is magnetic. It builds trust and fosters deeper connections. People are drawn to those who are real, who aren’t afraid to be themselves.

In a world full of carefully curated personas, being authentic can be a breath of fresh air. It shows that you respect yourself and the person you’re meeting enough to be real with them.

Don’t be afraid to be yourself when meeting someone for the first time. Authenticity is the secret ingredient that makes all the other points on this list truly effective.

Wrapping it up: It’s a journey

The art of social interaction is a lifelong journey, not a destination. It’s something that we continuously learn and improve upon throughout our lives.

These eight habits of people with strong social instincts are not innate talents but skills that are honed over time through practice, observation, and experience.

Remember, meeting someone for the first time is an opportunity for a new connection, a new story. Every person you meet is a chance to learn something new, to broaden your own perspective.

So, the next time you meet someone new, keep these habits in mind. But more importantly, be patient with yourself. Not all interactions will go as planned, and that’s okay.

Because at the end of the day, it’s about growing from each experience and becoming a better version of ourselves.

And who knows? With time and practice, you might just find that these habits have become second nature to you, transforming not just your first meetings, but all your social interactions.

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