9 things people don’t realize they do when they lack self-belief

Having self-belief is a game changer.

It’s the difference between feeling invincible and feeling invisible.

When you lack self-belief, you may not even realize how it’s dictating your actions.

Believe it or not, there are certain things that we unconsciously do when our self-confidence is low.

These can be subtle, yet they significantly influence how we interact with the world.

In this article, I’m going to unveil those 9 hidden actions.

Let’s dig into this together and shed light on some unnoticed behaviors that stem from a lack of self-belief.

1) Constant self-doubt

Let’s face it, we all have moments of uncertainty.

But when you lack self-belief, this uncertainty can become a constant companion.

The thing about constant self-doubt is that it’s often so subtle, you might not even realize you’re doing it.

It’s like a background noise that’s always there, influencing your actions and decisions in ways you may not consciously understand.

People with low self-confidence tend to question their abilities and second-guess their decisions more than those with high self-belief.

They may find themselves constantly seeking validation from others or feeling the need to justify their actions.

And while it’s normal and healthy to ask for feedback or consider different perspectives, the problem arises when this uncertainty becomes a default state of mind.

2) Over-apologizing

This is something I’ve personally experienced.

When my self-confidence was at its lowest, I found myself constantly saying “sorry” for everything – even when it wasn’t necessary.

I would apologize for things that were completely out of my control, for expressing my thoughts and feelings, or even for just taking up space.

It was as if I felt the need to apologize for simply existing.

Looking back, I realize that this over-apologizing was a reflection of my lack of self-belief.

I was so worried about upsetting others or being judged that I felt obliged to say sorry all the time.

The kicker is, most people didn’t even notice I was doing it.

It was just me, beating myself up and eroding my own self-confidence.

3) Shying away from risks

When you’re lacking in self-belief, the idea of taking risks can seem terrifying.

The fear of failure can become so overpowering that it’s easier to stay in your comfort zone rather than trying something new.

This hesitance isn’t just confined to big, life-changing decisions.

It can manifest in simple day-to-day choices too.

Picking a familiar dish over a new cuisine at a restaurant, sticking to the same workout routine because it’s safe and predictable, or even avoiding voicing an unconventional idea in a meeting.

People with low self-esteem are significantly less likely to engage in risky behavior compared to those with high self-esteem.

This isn’t always negative – it can sometimes prevent reckless decision-making.

But it also means potentially missing out on opportunities for growth and learning.

4) Downplaying achievements

When you lack self-belief, it’s common to downplay your own achievements.

You might attribute your success to luck or external factors rather than acknowledging your own skills and hard work.

“Well, anyone could have done it,” or “I just got lucky,” are common phrases you might find yourself saying.

This constant undermining of your accomplishments can negatively impact your self-esteem over time.

The truth is, your achievements are a testament to your abilities.

By attributing them to luck or external factors, you’re denying yourself the credit that you deserve.

5) Procrastination

Procrastination is often seen as a sign of laziness or poor time management. But did you know that it can also be a sign of low self-belief?

When you lack confidence in your abilities, it’s easy to put off tasks because you’re afraid of not doing them well.

You might find yourself waiting for the “perfect moment” to start, which never seems to come.

In reality, this procrastination is just a way of avoiding potential failure. But by doing so, you’re also avoiding opportunities for success.

So if you’re a chronic procrastinator, it might be worth asking yourself if a lack of self-belief is at the root of your behavior.

Recognizing this can be the first step towards overcoming procrastination and boosting your confidence.

6) Seeking constant validation

Sometimes, when you lack self-belief, you find yourself constantly seeking validation from others.

You may need others to reassure you that you’re doing okay, that your work is good enough, or that you’re valued.

It’s human nature to want to feel accepted and appreciated.

But when this need for external validation becomes excessive, it can start to chip away at your self-esteem.

You might start relying on other people’s opinions to define your self-worth, which leaves you vulnerable to criticism and can lead to a cycle of self-doubt and insecurity.

It’s your opinion of yourself that truly matters. You are more than enough just as you are.

And the moment you start believing this, you’ll find that the need for constant validation fades away.

7) Avoiding eye contact

I remember a time when looking someone directly in the eyes felt like the hardest thing to do.

It was as if by avoiding eye contact, I could hide my insecurity and self-doubt.

Eye contact is a powerful form of non-verbal communication. It can convey confidence, honesty, and connection.

But when you lack self-belief, maintaining eye contact can feel uncomfortable or intimidating.

You might worry about what the other person is thinking about you, or fear that they’ll see your insecurities if you look them in the eye.

But here’s the thing – avoiding eye contact can actually make you appear less confident.

It’s a small behavior that can have a big impact on how others perceive you.

Learning to hold someone’s gaze not only helps you come across as more confident, but it can also help boost your own self-belief over time.

8) Neglecting self-care

When you’re low on self-belief, it’s easy to neglect your own needs.

You might start prioritizing others over yourself or feel guilty for taking time out for self-care.

This can range from skipping meals or not getting enough sleep to constantly working without taking breaks.

You might even start neglecting your mental health, ignoring feelings of stress or anxiety instead of addressing them.

The irony is, neglecting self-care can further erode your self-confidence.

It sends a message to yourself that you’re not important, which is far from the truth.

Remember, taking care of yourself isn’t selfish, it’s essential. And you’re definitely worth it.

9) Fear of self-promotion

One of the most telling signs of low self-belief is the fear of self-promotion.

You might feel uncomfortable talking about your achievements or showcasing your skills, fearing that others will see you as arrogant or boastful.

But here’s the truth: Self-promotion isn’t bragging.

It’s acknowledging your worth and letting others know about it.

It’s about owning your accomplishments and standing by them.

If you’re scared of self-promotion, it’s a clear indication of low self-belief.

Your achievements are something to be proud of, not something to hide.

Letting others know about your skills and successes is not just okay – it’s necessary and deserved.

Final thought: The power of self-belief

The journey of self-discovery and personal growth is deeply intertwined with our self-belief.

It’s an invisible force that shapes our actions, decisions, and how we perceive the world.

American entrepreneur Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t – you’re right.”

This quote encapsulates the essence of self-belief. It’s a testament to the power our thoughts hold over our actions.

Recognizing signs of low self-belief is the first step towards a journey of self-improvement.

As you navigate this journey, remember to be kind to yourself.

Change takes time, and self-belief is not built overnight.

But with every small step forward, know that you’re moving closer towards embracing your true potential.