10 things people who love their lives do differently

There’s nothing better in life than a positive person.

People who genuinely love their lives positively affect everyone around them. Being around a person who has built a life they love can be an inspiring experience for anyone.

All of us have good days and bad ones. But someone who genuinely loves their life never loses sight of the big picture. And people who love their lives have several behaviors that help them stay positive and full of joy.

Maybe you’re already living a life that you love. But if not, consider adopting these behaviors. Before you know it, you’ll be building a joyful life for yourself.

1) They know life is short

Meditating on death doesn’t immediately sound like it will make you happy. But actually, understanding your limited mortality is a powerful tool for improving your life.

I have an app on my phone that reminds me that I’m going to die five times a day. This is based on a Bhutanese practice of regularly meditating on mortality. And Bhutan, despite being relatively poor, is routinely ranked as one of the happiest countries in the world.

Instead of being depressing, remembering that this life does not last forever is one of the key ways to help you enjoy it.

Tomorrow is not promised to any of us, so enjoy that meal. Savor that sunset. Go on that wild adventure, because one day – and none of us know when – it will be over.

2) They don’t worry about small things

In his best-selling book Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, Richard Carlson points out that we spend a lot of our lives getting annoyed and frustrated by things that, in the grand scheme of things, don’t matter very much.

Things like:

•       missing the bus and being late for work
•       our dog peeing on the bed
•       a clogged toilet
•       being cut off in traffic
•       developing a pimple right before a big date

As annoying as these experiences are, they don’t have lasting importance in our lives, unless we give it to them.

Here’s the thing:

Letting something small like this ruin your day can quickly become a habit. And the truth is, there will always be petty annoyances.

We can focus on them and live in a constant state of stress and frustration. Or we can let them go and love our lives.

3) They don’t care what other people think

Humans are social animals. That means we place a huge amount of importance in what other people think of us.

But people who love their lives have learned not to worry about the views of other people.

And they definitely know not to live their lives for others.

One thousand eight hundred years ago, Roman Emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius said, “I have often wondered how it is that every man loves himself more than all the rest of men, but yet sets less value on his own opinion of himself than on the opinion of others.”

Turns out, it doesn’t make much sense to worry about what others think.

The only opinion of you that matters is your own.

People who love their lives know this and live in a way that suits them, no matter what anyone else thinks.

That means they start that business, apply for that job, or move to that other country for a fresh adventure if that’s what they want.

4) They appreciate what they have

Ambition can be a good thing. And people who love their lives definitely have plenty of it.

But at the same time, healthy ambition needs to be balanced with appreciation of what you have.

In his popular book Peace Is Every Step, Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh says:

“We are very good at preparing to live, but not very good at living.  We know how to sacrifice ten years for a diploma, and we are willing to work very hard to get a job, a car, a house, and so on.  But we have difficulty remembering that we are alive in the present moment, the only moment there is for us to be alive.”

This is the essence of mindfulness.

Think about it: chasing happiness means you’ll always be chasing. If you don’t know how to be happy in the moment, you never will be, no matter what you achieve along the way.

People who love their lives appreciate small things that make them happy. It could be as simple as that first sip of coffee in the morning, or the sun shining through the bedroom window.

That’s because ultimately, life is made of 10,000 tiny things while we wait for bigger things to happen.

5) They understand themselves

Understanding yourself is the work of a lifetime. But it’s key to living a life you love.

We’re all taught that there are things that we should want. A bigger house. A better car. More money in the bank.

And maybe that makes some people happy. But that doesn’t mean it will work for you.

Understanding yourself and your own desires, then living out of that knowledge, is the key to a joyful life.

In my own experience, I’ve walked away from high-paying jobs and material success to find I was happier when I had less. Now, I live in a small seaside town in the south of France and genuinely love my life.

How did I get here? In part, because I knew what I wanted and went after it. Even if it wasn’t what other people told me I should do.

I know what I like and what it takes to make me happy. Knowing that makes it much easier to achieve it.

6) They know when to walk away

Everything has its end. And clinging on too long, whether it’s a job, a relationship, or a home, can keep you trapped and block you from building a life you really love.

I had a well-paying career. I had an apartment I owned in the beautiful city of Vancouver, one of the world’s most expensive real estate markets. I had a library full of books and an impressive single malt whisky collection.

I left all of that behind to move to the south of France.

Because even when things are very good, sometimes, it’s better to walk away.

And when things are bad, it’s almost always better.

As writer Joseph Campbell said, “You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.”

7) They dream big

On the other hand, knowing when to walk away is only half the equation. The other half is knowing what to walk to.

Just because people who love their lives appreciate the small joys they find every day doesn’t mean they don’t dream of something else.

The life I love wasn’t created by accident or on a whim. I spent years building toward it. And I had plenty of doubts along the way. But somehow, I become a professional writer who lives on the Mediterranean, because I believed it was possible.

Not all dreams are attainable. But sometimes, the journey is the destination. Following your dreams is the perfect way to build a life you love, even if you never get there.

8) They take responsibility

None of us get to choose the world we are born into. And we all have various limitations that are not our fault.

But people who build a life they love don’t dwell on what they can’t change. Instead, they take responsibility for creating their own life. Instead of waiting for someone to fix their problems, they fix them by themselves.

Taking responsibility for your own happiness is one of the most powerful things you can do to create a life you love.

9) They stay positive

It’s easy to stay positive when you have a good life.

But you’ll never get a good life without learning to stay positive first.

Being positive doesn’t mean you have a smile on your face 24/7, or that you are blind to the problems of the world.

Instead, it means you look for the positive in any situation you find yourself in.

After all, nothing teaches us greater lessons than hardship. Positive people know this, and they know how to use it as fuel to propel them toward a life they love.

10) They don’t envy anyone

There will always be someone who has something you want. Whether it’s something small like a pair of shoes or something big like a happy family, you can always find someone who has something you don’t.

But there’s a reason why people say comparison is the thief of joy.

Turns out, comparing ourselves to others is just another way of focusing on what we don’t have, instead of what we do. And that’s the opposite of loving your life.

Creating a life you love

No matter where you are in life, you can start building a life you love today.

You can start by loving the life that you have. By appreciating the small things. By refusing to compare yourself with others.

And by staying positive and dreaming big, you can move toward the life you’ve always wanted.

The world needs nothing more than people who genuinely love their lives. Here’s hoping you’re one of them.