For most of my twenties, I thought being articulate meant being able to use the right vocabulary at the right moment. I'd read a lot. I'd picked up the phrases. I knew when to say "nuanced" and "trajectory" and "tension between" and "the broader pattern." In meetings I could ...Read More
I've started to notice a particular kind of loneliness that doesn't look like loneliness from the outside. The person has a family. A long marriage, maybe. A job where people know their name. They show up to birthdays, they answer texts, they're surrounded by people who care about them ...Read More
There is a generational argument that has played out at countless kitchen tables for the past decade. A baby boomer says something about elbow grease, personal responsibility, and the dignity of putting in the hours. A millennial or Gen Z relative rolls their eyes. The boomer feels dismissed. ...Read More
It happens within about the first ten minutes. They arrive. The grandchildren run in. Coats come off, bags get dumped on the bench. I put the kettle on. Then, somewhere around the second cup, I notice it. They've started talking about me. Not to me. About me. With each other. ...Read More
The first month of retirement is often quite nice. Then something stranger starts to happen, and almost nobody warns you about it. It isn't loneliness, exactly. It's something more specific. You start to notice, slowly, that the people you assumed were your friends for the last twenty years aren't ringing. ...Read More
There’s a kind of family distance people don’t talk about very honestly. Not the dramatic kind. Not the slammed-door argument. Not the parent being cut off completely. Not the explosive falling out where everyone knows what happened and nobody agrees on who started it. I’m talking about something quieter. The adult child ...Read More