7 spending habits that scream “trying too hard” to anyone who actually has money

by Lachlan Brown | May 4, 2026, 5:25 pm

We all know that guy.

The one with the designer belt, the limited-edition sneakers, the lease on the flashiest car he can barely afford—and the nervous energy of someone constantly checking if anyone noticed.

Here’s the thing most people won’t say out loud: people with real money don’t feel the need to flex.

In fact, the louder someone tries to signal wealth, the more obvious it is to those who’ve actually made it that they’re just playing pretend.

So if you want to avoid falling into the trap of performative success, here are seven spending habits that quietly scream “I’m trying too hard”—especially to people who already have the financial security you’re trying to signal.

1. Flashy cars with payments they can’t afford

Ever notice how the richest people often drive pretty ordinary cars?

There’s a reason for that. Most high-net-worth individuals value practicality and discretion. They’re not interested in dropping half their paycheck on a luxury lease just to impress strangers at red lights.

Don’t get me wrong—there’s nothing inherently wrong with driving a nice car. But when someone’s car payments rival their rent, it’s a red flag. It’s less about the car and more about needing validation.

From a psychology perspective, this is a textbook case of compensatory consumption—using external purchases to fill an internal gap. When someone drives a top-of-the-line sports car but still lives with two roommates in a barely furnished apartment, the mismatch reveals that the spending isn’t about enjoyment. It’s about managing how others perceive them.

2. Designer everything—even the basics

There’s a subtle difference between appreciating quality and obsessing over labels.

The wealthy often value craftsmanship, sure—but they’re not wearing logos the size of dinner plates on their chest.

When someone insists on Gucci socks, Dior sunglasses, and Balenciaga gym wear, it starts to feel more like a costume than personal style.

It’s not about fashion—it’s about optics.

True wealth doesn’t feel the need to announce itself. In fact, some of the most financially secure people prefer understated brands you’ve probably never heard of.

When you’re constantly chasing labels to look rich, the irony is you usually just look insecure.

3. “Bottle service” culture

Ever dropped hundreds—if not thousands—at a club for a table and a few sparkler-carrying waitresses?

That’s the kind of thing that sounds impressive in a rap video, but in real life, people with actual money are quietly rolling their eyes.

Buying bottle service isn’t about the alcohol (which, by the way, is typically marked up 500%+). It’s about saying, “Look at me. I can afford to waste money for the illusion of status.”

There’s a telling pattern among people who’ve achieved genuine financial security: many of them step away from these scenes entirely—not because they can’t afford it, but because they no longer feel the need to prove anything.

And that’s the difference.

4. “Influencer” vacations they can’t truly afford

We all love a good getaway. But there’s a certain type of trip that’s more about getting the shot than enjoying the experience.

You know the kind: luxury resorts booked on credit, outfits bought just for photos, excursions chosen for how they’ll look on Instagram, not for how they’ll feel in the moment.

There’s a Buddhist teaching I love that goes something like this: “Chasing illusions leads to suffering.” And that’s exactly what this is—a chase. Not for peace, not for joy, but for a curated image of success.

Research shows that social media-driven travel—often called “Instagram tourism”—encourages specific destination choices and behaviors aimed at crafting pictures, not memories. Visitors prioritize photo ops over immersive experiences, and many feel pressure to recreate viral images, fueling envy and superficial interactions with places and people.

The wealthy? They might travel more often, but you won’t always see it. Because they’re not performing—they’re living.

5. Spending big on tech they barely use

Latest iPhone. Top-tier laptop. $4,000 camera rig for someone who only takes selfies. You get the picture.

This one’s common among people trying to “look successful” rather than be successful. They treat expensive tech as proof of progress—even if they don’t need half the features.

Success isn’t about the tools—it’s about what you do with them. Plenty of creators built six-figure businesses off a smartphone and basic gear. And plenty of wannabes have closets full of tech collecting dust.

If someone’s always upgrading just to keep up, it’s usually a sign they’re measuring self-worth by their receipts.

6. Throwing money at every new trend

Crypto. NFTs. Smart mirrors. That $800 juicer everyone bought during the wellness craze.

Trendy spending is a sneaky one. It can feel like you’re being “ahead of the curve,” but in reality, it often just reveals a lack of groundedness.

People who’ve built real wealth tend to stick to what works. They invest in things that compound: skills, health, experiences, relationships.

A 2025 survey by Empower found that 57% of Americans made financial decisions influenced by others’ online lifestyles—and about half admitted they’ve spent money specifically due to FOMO.

Jumping from one expensive fad to the next might look adventurous, but it often stems from a deeper fear—of missing out, of being left behind, of not being enough.

When your money follows every shiny object, your mindset probably does too.

7. Over-customizing everything to look exclusive

Monogrammed luggage. Personalized license plates. Gold-plated phone cases. Don’t even get me started on bedazzled headphones.

There’s a tipping point where customizing things stops being about individuality and starts being about broadcasting status. And most people who’ve actually built wealth can spot the difference instantly.

True exclusivity doesn’t need a nameplate. It’s quiet. It’s confident. It doesn’t need your attention—and that’s exactly what makes it powerful.

The common thread across all seven of these habits isn’t spending itself—it’s the motivation behind it. When purchases are driven by how others will perceive you rather than what genuinely adds value to your life, you end up in an exhausting cycle of performance.

Psychology research consistently shows that extrinsic motivation—doing things for external approval—leads to less satisfaction than intrinsic motivation, where you act based on personal values and genuine enjoyment.

Real financial confidence isn’t loud. It doesn’t need a spotlight. And the people who have it? They can usually tell in seconds who’s faking it.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Brown Brothers Media, a digital publishing network reaching tens of millions of readers monthly. He holds a Graduate Diploma of Psychological Studies from Deakin University, though his real education came afterward: a warehouse job shifting TVs, a stretch of anxiety in his mid-twenties, and the slow discovery that studying the mind is not the same as learning how to live well. He started experimenting with Buddhist principles during breaks at the warehouse and eventually began writing about what he was learning. That writing became Hack Spirit, a widely read personal development site, and his book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism became a bestseller. His work breaks down complex ideas into frameworks people can apply immediately, whether they are navigating a career change, a difficult relationship, or the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Lachlan splits his time between Singapore and Saigon. He writes about high-performance routines, decision-making under pressure, digital innovation, and the intersection of Eastern philosophy with modern life. His perspective comes from having built things from scratch, failed at some of them, and learned that clarity comes from practice, not theory.