8 awkward things people with poor social skills do in public without realizing it

by Lachlan Brown | August 9, 2025, 9:14 pm

Most of us have experienced moments of social awkwardness—tripping over our words, forgetting a name, or mistiming a handshake. But for people with poor social skills, these awkward moments aren’t just occasional accidents. They can be part of a pattern that makes interactions feel uncomfortable for everyone involved.

The tricky part? Many of these behaviors happen unconsciously. If you’ve ever left a social setting wondering why the atmosphere felt tense—or if others seemed eager to wrap up the conversation—there’s a good chance one of these awkward habits was at play.

Below are eight common things people with underdeveloped social skills often do in public without realizing it—plus insights into why they happen and how to avoid them.

1. Talking only about themselves

One of the most socially awkward (and common) habits is turning every conversation into a personal monologue.
This can show up as:

  • Ignoring questions about the other person.

  • Steering every topic back to their own experiences.

  • Sharing overly detailed stories without pausing to check in.

Why it happens: People with poor social skills sometimes lack the awareness—or the listening habits—that keep conversations balanced. They might see socializing as “taking turns talking” rather than “building a shared moment.”

How to avoid it: A simple rule is the “Question-Comment-Question” method—ask something about the other person, respond with a brief comment of your own, then follow up with another question. It keeps the focus from drifting entirely onto you.

2. Standing too close (or too far)

Personal space is invisible—but it’s deeply felt. Stand too close, and you risk coming across as intrusive or intimidating. Stand too far, and you may seem standoffish or disinterested.

Why it happens: Cultural differences, lack of observation skills, or simply not picking up on body language cues can all play a role. Some people genuinely don’t notice when someone takes a subtle step back to reclaim space.

How to avoid it: Pay attention to micro-movements. If someone shifts their chair back, leans away, or keeps stepping back, it’s a sign you’re in their comfort zone. As a general guideline in casual Western settings, about an arm’s length is a safe distance for conversation.

3. Interrupting without realizing it

Cutting someone off mid-sentence is one of the fastest ways to make a social exchange uncomfortable. Even if your intention is excitement or enthusiasm, it can make others feel steamrolled.

Why it happens: For some, it’s impatience. For others, it’s a belief that conversations move faster when you overlap speech. And sometimes, it’s just anxiety—wanting to get a thought out before you forget it.

How to avoid it: Practice what’s called “conversational breathing.” When someone finishes speaking, count one silent beat in your head before responding. It feels long at first, but it signals respect and gives the other person room to fully express themselves.

4. Oversharing personal details

There’s a fine line between openness and overexposure. People with poor social skills sometimes cross it by revealing deeply personal or inappropriate information to people they barely know.

Examples include:

  • Sharing medical details at the dinner table.

  • Complaining about a partner or family member to a casual acquaintance.

  • Launching into stories about finances, grudges, or intimate habits.

Why it happens: This often stems from a misunderstanding of intimacy. They assume that sharing a lot equals bonding quickly—without realizing it can overwhelm or repel others.

How to avoid it: Use the “three-meeting rule.” Save highly personal disclosures for people you’ve interacted with at least three times in a comfortable setting.

5. Not reading the room

This is more than just missing a joke—it’s failing to notice the general mood or context of a situation.

It can look like:

  • Making loud, casual conversation in a solemn setting.

  • Talking about politics at a child’s birthday party.

  • Using humor when others are trying to be serious.

Why it happens: Reading the room relies on picking up subtle social cues—facial expressions, tone shifts, and body posture. People with poor social skills may either miss these cues entirely or misinterpret them.

How to avoid it: Periodically “scan” during interactions. Are people laughing, leaning in, and engaging? Or are they looking at their phones, glancing toward the exit, or giving short responses? Adjust accordingly.

6. Avoiding eye contact (or overdoing it)

Eye contact is one of the most powerful tools in human connection. But it’s easy to get wrong.

Two common mistakes:

  • Too little eye contact → can seem evasive, nervous, or disinterested.

  • Too much eye contact → can feel intense, aggressive, or even creepy.

Why it happens: Poor social skills often come with discomfort around vulnerability. Since eye contact can feel intimate, some avoid it altogether—while others overcompensate in an attempt to seem confident.

How to avoid it: Aim for intermittent eye contact—look into the other person’s eyes for a few seconds at a time, then glance away naturally. Think of it as “checking in,” not “staring down.”

7. Misjudging humor and sarcasm

Humor is socially risky—it depends heavily on timing, audience, and context. People with poor social skills often misfire in three ways:

  1. Making a joke that feels mean-spirited.

  2. Missing sarcasm entirely and taking it literally.

  3. Forcing a joke into a moment that doesn’t need one.

Why it happens: Successful humor requires empathy—being able to predict how the other person will receive it. Without that skill, even well-meant jokes can land awkwardly.

How to avoid it: Use light, observational humor rather than risky or personal jabs—especially with people you don’t know well. If you try sarcasm and it doesn’t land, quickly clarify without dragging it out.

8. Failing to close conversations gracefully

Ending an interaction can be just as socially delicate as starting one. People with poor social skills sometimes:

  • Walk away abruptly without signaling they’re leaving.

  • Keep talking long after the other person is trying to disengage.

  • End the conversation on a flat or awkward note.

Why it happens: Some simply don’t notice when the natural “wrap-up point” arrives. Others feel anxious about saying goodbye, so they avoid it until the last possible moment.

How to avoid it: Look for cues—like the other person mentioning the time, packing up their things, or shifting their body away. Use a polite closer such as, “I should let you go, but it was great catching up.” It leaves the interaction on a positive note.

The bottom line

Poor social skills aren’t a fixed trait—they’re habits and blind spots, most of which can be improved with awareness and practice. The key is observation: notice how others respond, and be willing to adjust.

If you recognize yourself in any of these eight habits, don’t treat it as a personal flaw. Instead, see it as feedback from the social environment—a sign that with small adjustments, you can make public interactions feel easier, warmer, and more enjoyable for everyone.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Brown Brothers Media, a digital publishing network reaching tens of millions of readers monthly. He holds a Graduate Diploma of Psychological Studies from Deakin University, though his real education came afterward: a warehouse job shifting TVs, a stretch of anxiety in his mid-twenties, and the slow discovery that studying the mind is not the same as learning how to live well. He started experimenting with Buddhist principles during breaks at the warehouse and eventually began writing about what he was learning. That writing became Hack Spirit, a widely read personal development site, and his book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism became a bestseller. His work breaks down complex ideas into frameworks people can apply immediately, whether they are navigating a career change, a difficult relationship, or the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Lachlan splits his time between Singapore and Saigon. He writes about high-performance routines, decision-making under pressure, digital innovation, and the intersection of Eastern philosophy with modern life. His perspective comes from having built things from scratch, failed at some of them, and learned that clarity comes from practice, not theory.