I used to be awkward until I mastered these 9 simple responses

by Lachlan Brown | October 20, 2025, 9:09 pm

There was a time in my life when I dreaded small talk. Parties felt like minefields, networking events left me sweaty and tongue-tied, and even casual chats with friends sometimes spiraled into awkward silences.

It wasn’t that I didn’t want to connect. I did. I just didn’t know what to say. I overthought every word, worried about sounding stupid, and replayed conversations in my head long after they ended.

But then I realized something important: being socially smooth isn’t about having dazzling stories or the perfect joke ready. It’s about having a toolkit of simple, reliable responses you can lean on when your brain freezes or self-doubt kicks in.

Over the years, I’ve tested different approaches, and nine responses consistently helped me go from “awkward guy in the corner” to someone who can walk into a room and actually enjoy talking to people.

Let me share them with you.

1. “That’s interesting, tell me more.”

This response changed everything for me. For years, I thought conversations were about proving myself—being funny, insightful, or impressive. But people don’t remember you for how clever you sounded. They remember how you made them feel.

Asking someone to tell you more shows genuine curiosity. It takes the pressure off you to perform and invites the other person to open up. I’ve had entire conversations flow just from this one phrase.

It works everywhere: at a networking event, with a colleague, even on a date. People love to feel heard, and you instantly become more engaging when you give them that gift.

2. “I can see why you’d feel that way.”

Validation is a social superpower. Early on, I made the mistake of trying to debate or “fix” people’s opinions. I thought I was being helpful, but in reality, I was shutting them down.

When you respond with empathy—acknowledging someone’s feelings without judgment—you create trust. You don’t have to agree with them, just recognize their perspective.

I remember once when a coworker vented about a stressful deadline. My instinct was to offer solutions. Instead, I said, “I can see why you’d feel that way.” Her shoulders relaxed, and she opened up more. That moment taught me that empathy deepens connection far more than advice.

3. “That reminds me of…”

This is a bridging phrase. It helps you contribute without derailing the conversation. Instead of abruptly changing topics (which I used to do all the time), you link your thought to what’s already being discussed.

For example: someone talks about their recent trip to Japan. You can say, “That reminds me of when I tried sushi for the first time…” Suddenly, it feels like a natural continuation instead of a random tangent.

This response creates flow, and flow is what turns small talk into real conversation.

4. “How did you get into that?”

Most people’s lives look ordinary on the surface, but dig deeper and you’ll find fascinating stories. Asking this question has led me to hear about a friend’s grandfather who built radios in the war, a barista who once played violin on cruise ships, and a colleague who stumbled into his career by accident after missing a train.

When you ask someone how they got into something, you invite a story rather than a one-word answer. It’s one of the easiest ways to transform chit-chat into meaningful dialogue.

And bonus: people love sharing their journeys. It makes them feel valued and understood.

5. “That makes sense.”

This is my go-to when I want to acknowledge what someone’s saying without breaking the flow. It’s simple, but it communicates respect and attentiveness.

Before I learned this, I had a habit of nodding silently, which sometimes made people wonder if I was bored or zoned out. Saying “That makes sense” reassures them that you’re engaged.

It’s also a great neutral response when you’re not sure what to say. Instead of fumbling for words, you validate them and keep things moving.

6. “I never thought of it that way.”

This phrase shows humility and openness, two qualities people instinctively trust. For someone who used to feel awkward, it was liberating to realize I didn’t always have to be right.

When someone shares an opinion, and you respond with this line, it’s like giving them a gift: the gift of being appreciated for expanding your perspective.

I’ve used this response in debates, brainstorming sessions, and even casual chats about movies. It shifts the energy from competition to collaboration—and that’s when real connection happens.

7. “What’s been the highlight of your week?”

Awkward silences used to terrify me. I’d panic, blurt something random, and make things worse. Then I discovered the power of this question.

It’s positive, specific, and easy to answer. People light up when they think about a highlight—whether it’s as big as landing a new job or as small as trying a delicious meal.

Unlike the generic “How are you?” this response opens doors to stories, laughter, and shared excitement. It’s the kind of question that leaves people feeling good about the conversation—and about you.

8. “That’s a good point.”

Sometimes the best way to connect is by giving credit. Too often, we listen just to reply. But when you pause and acknowledge someone’s contribution, it makes them feel seen.

I started using this in group settings—team meetings, brainstorming sessions, even dinner with friends. When someone offered an idea, I’d respond with, “That’s a good point.” Simple, but powerful.

It’s amazing how much goodwill you build just by recognizing others. People feel respected, and they’ll naturally gravitate toward you.

9. “I’d love to hear your thoughts.”

Here’s the truth: socially confident people don’t dominate conversations. They make space for others. This response does exactly that.

When I first tried it, I worried people would think I didn’t have anything to contribute. But the opposite happened. By inviting others to share, I came across as thoughtful and confident enough not to need the spotlight.

It’s especially effective with quieter people. Everyone has something valuable to say, and when you give them the chance, you create deeper, more memorable interactions.

Putting it all together

At first glance, these responses might seem almost too simple. But that’s the point.

Social awkwardness often comes from overcomplicating things—trying to script the perfect line or worrying endlessly about what others think. What I’ve learned is that connection thrives on small, consistent signals of interest, respect, and empathy.

These nine responses became my safety net. Whenever I felt the familiar nerves rising, I’d lean on one of them. Slowly, the awkwardness melted away. I started enjoying conversations instead of surviving them.

Over time, something even better happened: I didn’t need to “fake it” anymore. By practicing these responses, I naturally became more curious, empathetic, and confident. My social skills weren’t just smoother—they were more genuine.

Final reflection

If you’ve ever felt like the awkward one in the room, I get it. I’ve been there. The good news is that you don’t need to reinvent yourself or become a different person.

You just need a toolkit—a few simple responses you can rely on until confidence becomes second nature.

So the next time you feel your mind go blank, try one of these:

  • “That’s interesting, tell me more.”

  • “I can see why you’d feel that way.”

  • “That reminds me of…”

  • “How did you get into that?”

  • “That makes sense.”

  • “I never thought of it that way.”

  • “What’s been the highlight of your week?”

  • “That’s a good point.”

  • “I’d love to hear your thoughts.”

I can’t promise you’ll become the life of every party overnight. But I can promise this: you’ll stop dreading conversations, start enjoying them, and discover that most people are a lot easier to connect with than you think.

And who knows? One day you might look back, like I did, and realize: I used to be awkward—until I mastered these nine simple responses.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Brown Brothers Media, a digital publishing network reaching tens of millions of readers monthly. He holds a Graduate Diploma of Psychological Studies from Deakin University, though his real education came afterward: a warehouse job shifting TVs, a stretch of anxiety in his mid-twenties, and the slow discovery that studying the mind is not the same as learning how to live well. He started experimenting with Buddhist principles during breaks at the warehouse and eventually began writing about what he was learning. That writing became Hack Spirit, a widely read personal development site, and his book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism became a bestseller. His work breaks down complex ideas into frameworks people can apply immediately, whether they are navigating a career change, a difficult relationship, or the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Lachlan splits his time between Singapore and Saigon. He writes about high-performance routines, decision-making under pressure, digital innovation, and the intersection of Eastern philosophy with modern life. His perspective comes from having built things from scratch, failed at some of them, and learned that clarity comes from practice, not theory.