You know someone was raised with good manners if they do these 7 things at the dinner table
There’s a lot to be said about manners, especially when it comes to dining etiquette.
It’s often said that you can tell a lot about a person’s upbringing by observing their behaviour at the dinner table.
There’s a certain grace and finesse that comes from being well-mannered – it’s not just about the “pleases” and “thank yous”.
Good manners are more about considerate behaviour, thoughtfulness, and respect for others.
And, while there are many signs of good manners, there are seven particular behaviours that are a sure-fire indication of an individual’s polite upbringing.
Stay tuned as I share these 7 tell-tale signs that show someone was raised with good manners, specifically when they’re dining at the table.
1) They always say ‘please’ and ‘thank you’
Manners make the man, as the old saying goes. And there’s nothing that screams good manners more than the simple act of saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’.
When dining, a well-mannered person will always remember to say ‘please’ when asking for something to be passed, and a sincere ‘thank you’ when it’s given.
It’s a tiny but powerful gesture that shows respect for others at the table.
It’s not just about the words, though; it’s also about the tone.
A genuine ‘please’ or ‘thank you’ said in a warm, friendly tone can create a pleasant atmosphere, making meals a more enjoyable experience for everyone involved.
This simple habit is often instilled at a young age and is usually a clear indicator of someone’s upbringing.
So, if you notice this habit in someone at your dinner table, they were likely raised with good manners.
2) They never start eating before everyone else
One thing my mother always taught me was to never start eating before everyone else at the table has been served. It’s a rule I still follow to this day.
Whether I’m at a family gathering, a business lunch, or a dinner party, I always wait for everyone to have their meal before I begin to eat.
To me, it’s a sign of respect and consideration for others.
I remember one time when I was attending a friend’s birthday dinner. The food was taking a while to arrive, and everyone was starving.
When my dish finally arrived, it was tempting to dig in immediately.
But instead, I waited for everyone else’s meals to arrive before starting to eat.
It wasn’t easy, especially with the delicious aroma wafting from my plate, but it’s a small act that speaks volumes about good manners.
And these are the types of behaviors that differentiate individuals who have been raised with etiquette in mind.
3) They know how to use their utensils properly
In the world of dining, there’s a whole language of utensils. The way a person uses their knife and fork can be a clear indication of their upbringing.
Proper etiquette dictates that the fork is held in the left hand and the knife in the right. The knife is used for cutting, while the fork is used for eating.
Once you’re done cutting your food, it’s considered polite to lay your knife across the top of your plate and continue eating with your fork.
Interestingly, this style of dining, known as “Continental Style”, is standard in most parts of Europe. Meanwhile, the “American Style” involves switching the fork to the right hand after cutting food.
Either way, knowing how to handle utensils correctly is a clear sign that someone has been taught good manners from a young age.
Observing this at the dinner table can tell you a lot about a person’s upbringing.
4) They don’t talk with their mouth full

No matter how engrossing the conversation might be, a well-mannered individual will never talk with their mouth full.
It’s a simple rule that we’ve all been taught from a young age, and yet it’s surprising how many people forget it.
Talking with your mouth full is not only visually unappealing, but it also risks food particles flying out mid-sentence. More importantly, it shows a lack of respect for the other diners at the table.
A person who was raised with good manners will always take the time to chew and swallow their food before speaking.
It’s a small act of courtesy that can go a long way in maintaining a pleasant dining experience for everyone at the table.
5) They never reach across the table
There was a time when I thought reaching across the table to grab the salt shaker was no big deal.
Until one dinner engagement, when I stretched over two guests to grab a condiment, my sleeve dipped into the gravy boat, creating an awkward moment and a messy cleanup.
Reaching across the table is a faux pas in dining etiquette. It disrupts the flow of conversation and invades personal space.
A well-mannered individual knows better.
Instead of reaching for something, they’d politely ask the person closest to pass it. It’s about being considerate of others’ space and maintaining an orderly environment at the dinner table.
That little gravy boat incident was embarrassing, but it was a good lesson in dining etiquette.
Even now, every time I find myself about to reach across the table, I remember that moment and quickly correct myself.
6) They always keep their phone off the table
In today’s digital age, the presence of mobile phones at the dinner table has become a common sight. However, someone raised with good manners knows that this is a big no-no.
A well-mannered person understands that meal times are for eating and engaging in conversation with those present.
Having a phone on the table can be distracting and can take away from the communal experience of sharing a meal.
By keeping their phone away, they show respect for those around them and give their full attention to the meal and the conversation.
This small act of courtesy speaks volumes about their upbringing and their respect for dining etiquette.
7) They always chew with their mouth closed
This one might seem like a no-brainer, but it’s surprising how many people overlook this basic rule of dining etiquette.
Chewing with your mouth closed is not only polite, but it also enhances the dining experience for everyone at the table.
No one wants to see (or hear) what you’re chewing. It can be a real appetite killer. A well-mannered individual knows this and always makes an effort to chew their food quietly and with their mouth closed.
It’s a small act that can make a big difference and is often the hallmark of someone who has been raised with good manners.
Final thoughts: It’s all about respect
Dining etiquette, at its core, isn’t just about using the right fork or saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you’. It’s a reflection of one’s respect for others and their consideration for the shared experience.
These seven signs of good manners at the dinner table aren’t exhaustive. However, they serve as strong indicators of a person’s upbringing.
Whether it’s waiting for everyone to be served before eating, using utensils correctly, or keeping mobile phones off the table, each act is a testament to the individual’s character and their understanding of social decorum.
As the great Emily Post – renowned champion of etiquette – once said, “Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use.”
So next time you sit down to dine with others, observe these nuances. You might find they reveal far more about your companions than just their table manners.
