Why “follow your dreams” is terrible advice (and what to do instead)

by Lachlan Brown | August 28, 2025, 11:29 am

I used to be one of those people who bought into the “follow your dreams” narrative completely.

Fresh out of my degree, I was convinced that if I just pursued what I was passionate about, everything would magically fall into place. The money would follow, fulfillment would be guaranteed, and I’d wake up every morning excited to start my day.

What actually happened? I spent months chasing vague ideas of what I thought I wanted, jumping from one “passion project” to another, and getting nowhere fast.

The harsh reality hit me when I realized I was broke, frustrated, and no closer to building anything meaningful. That’s when I started questioning whether this whole “follow your dreams” thing was actually terrible advice.

Why “follow your dreams” sets you up for failure

Here’s the problem with telling people to follow their dreams: most of us don’t actually know what our dreams are.

We think we do. We have these romantic ideas about what would make us happy, usually based on what looks good from the outside or what society tells us we should want.

But when you dig deeper, these “dreams” are often just fantasies—untested, unrealistic expectations that crumble the moment they meet reality.

I remember watching a video by Alan Watts way back when I was just getting started where he encouraged people to ask themselves what they would do if money were no object. It was inspiring, sure, but it also completely ignored the practical realities of building a life.

The truth is, passion alone isn’t enough. You can be passionate about something and still be terrible at it. You can love doing something that the world doesn’t need or value.

Author and professor Scott Galloway advises: “Don’t follow your passion, follow your talent. Determine what you are good at (early), and commit to becoming great at it. You don’t have to love it, just don’t hate it.”

Reading this more recently made complete sense.

The skills I was naturally good at—writing, understanding human psychology, connecting ideas—these were the things that actually led to opportunities. 

Don’t get me wrong, passions are great. They add color to life and can be incredibly fulfilling. But they’re not everything, and building your entire career around them is often a recipe for disappointment.

What I wish someone had told me instead

After my reality check, I started approaching my career differently. Instead of chasing abstract dreams, I began focusing on what I could actually build with the skills I had.

I looked at what came naturally to me—breaking down complex psychological concepts, writing in a way that people could relate to, understanding what made people tick. 

That’s when I started Hackspirit.

The difference was immediate. Instead of struggling against my limitations, I was working with my natural abilities. Progress became measurable. Growth became sustainable.

The power of value-driven pursuits

Here’s what I’ve learned works better than following dreams: following your values.

Values are different from passions. Passions are feelings—they come and go, they’re unpredictable, and they’re often based on idealized versions of reality. Values are principles that guide how you want to live and what kind of impact you want to have.

For me, my core values became clear: helping people understand themselves better, making complex ideas accessible, and contributing something meaningful to people’s personal growth.

These values could be expressed through multiple paths. Writing, speaking, creating courses, building communities—the specific vehicle mattered less than the underlying purpose.

I’ve talked about this before, but values-driven work is more sustainable because it’s not dependent on feeling inspired every day. Some days I don’t feel ‘passionate’ about writing at all, but I still show up because the work aligns with something deeper than fleeting emotions.

This approach is also more adaptable. When you’re chasing a specific dream, you become rigid. When one path doesn’t work out, you feel like you’ve failed entirely. But when you’re guided by values, you can pivot, adjust, and find new ways to express what matters to you.

The research backs this up too. Studies show that people who align their work with their personal values report higher job satisfaction and are less likely to leave that job.

Basically, values give you direction without limiting your options. They provide meaning without requiring perfection.

A different approach that actually works

So what should you do instead of blindly following your dreams? Start with honest self-assessment.

Look at what you’re naturally good at—not what you wish you were good at, but what actually comes easily to you. What do people consistently ask for your help with? What tasks feel effortless while others struggle with them?

Then identify your core values. What kind of impact do you want to have? What principles do you want your life to reflect? This isn’t about grand gestures—it’s about the day-to-day choices that add up to something meaningful.

Next, look for intersections. Where do your natural abilities meet real-world needs? Where can your values be expressed through work that people actually want and will pay for?

This approach isn’t as sexy as “follow your dreams,” but it’s infinitely more practical. It’s also more honest about what building a fulfilling life actually requires—patience, skill development, and a willingness to start where you are, not where you wish you were.

Recently, I read Rudá Iandê’s book Laughing in the Face of Chaos, and one insight really struck me. As he puts it: “You have both the right and responsibility to explore and try until you know yourself deeply.” This isn’t about following some predetermined path—it’s about actively discovering who you are through experimentation and honest reflection.

Self-discovery isn’t passive; it requires actually trying things, failing at some, succeeding at others, and gradually building a clearer picture of what works for you specifically.

Finally, accept that there’s no single “perfect” path

Perhaps most importantly, let go of the idea that there’s one magical career or pursuit that will solve all your problems and make you perpetually happy.

Life is messier than that. Fulfillment comes from multiple sources—meaningful work, strong relationships, personal growth, contribution to something bigger than yourself.

Your career doesn’t have to be your entire identity or your only source of meaning. Sometimes the most practical approach is finding work that pays well, doesn’t drain your soul, and gives you the freedom to pursue what matters to you in other areas of life.

The goal isn’t to find your “one true calling.” It’s to build a life that reflects your values, utilizes your strengths, and provides enough stability and satisfaction to keep moving forward.

Final words

“Follow your dreams” sounds inspiring, but it’s often just another way of saying “figure it out yourself” without providing any real guidance.

What actually works is more practical: know your strengths, clarify your values, and build something sustainable at the intersection of what you’re good at and what the world needs.

Your dreams might change, your passions might fade, but your values and natural abilities are more reliable foundations for building a life you can be proud of.

Stop chasing fantasies and start building reality. It’s less romantic, but it’s also less likely to leave you broke and disillusioned.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Brown Brothers Media, a digital publishing network reaching tens of millions of readers monthly. He holds a Graduate Diploma of Psychological Studies from Deakin University, though his real education came afterward: a warehouse job shifting TVs, a stretch of anxiety in his mid-twenties, and the slow discovery that studying the mind is not the same as learning how to live well. He started experimenting with Buddhist principles during breaks at the warehouse and eventually began writing about what he was learning. That writing became Hack Spirit, a widely read personal development site, and his book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism became a bestseller. His work breaks down complex ideas into frameworks people can apply immediately, whether they are navigating a career change, a difficult relationship, or the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Lachlan splits his time between Singapore and Saigon. He writes about high-performance routines, decision-making under pressure, digital innovation, and the intersection of Eastern philosophy with modern life. His perspective comes from having built things from scratch, failed at some of them, and learned that clarity comes from practice, not theory.