10 phrases that quickly make you sound less intelligent

by Lachlan Brown | May 5, 2026, 9:37 pm

Have you ever walked away from a conversation thinking, “Did I sound stupid just then?” You’re not alone.

The words we use shape how others perceive our intelligence, confidence, and credibility. And while intelligence is complex and multi-faceted, research in psychology consistently shows that certain speech habits can create an impression of low cognitive ability—even when it’s not true.

It’s not always about big words or academic language. In fact, it’s often the small phrases we use without thinking that do the most damage.

Let’s explore 10 common phrases that can instantly make you sound less intelligent—and how to upgrade them without sounding pretentious.

1. “I’m not sure, but…”

This phrase might sound humble, but it immediately undercuts your credibility.

What psychology says: According to research on “self-handicapping” (Rhodewalt, 2008), people often preface statements with uncertainty to protect themselves from potential failure or judgment. But doing so habitually signals low confidence and cognitive uncertainty.

✅ Say instead: “From what I understand…” or “One perspective is…”

Even if you’re not completely sure, framing your thought with a more confident lead-in boosts credibility while still allowing room for correction.

2. “Like, you know?”

This filler-laden phrase is a hallmark of unpolished speech.

What psychology says: According to a study published in the Journal of Language and Social Psychology (Laserna, Seih, & Pennebaker, 2014), excessive use of filler words like “like,” “you know,” and “um” is associated with lower perceived intelligence and authority, especially in professional or formal settings.

✅ Say instead: Simply pause and breathe. Silence can be more powerful than a filler.

If you need a transition, try “for example” or “that said”—words that add meaning rather than take it away.

3. “To be honest…”

You might think this builds trust. But what does it imply about everything else you’ve said?

What psychology says: According to Dr. John Lund, a communication expert, phrases like “to be honest” or “honestly speaking” can create subconscious distrust. They imply that the rest of what you’re saying—or have said—is somehow less honest.

✅ Say instead: Just state your opinion directly. Let your tone and content do the work of building credibility.

4. “I literally died.”

Unless you’re a ghost, you didn’t.

What psychology says: Hyperbolic expressions—especially when misused—can make the speaker appear emotionally reactive or intellectually careless. A study on language exaggeration found that people often interpret exaggerated emotional language as a lack of emotional control.

✅ Say instead: “I was really shocked” or “It blew my mind.” Express emotion clearly—without misusing language.

5. “Whatever.”

Dismissive, vague, and mentally lazy.

What psychology says: “Whatever” is often used as a defense mechanism in emotionally charged conversations, according to research on avoidance communication. It signals disinterest, avoidance, or a lack of argumentation skill—all of which lower perceived intelligence in dialogue.

✅ Say instead: “Let’s agree to disagree” or “That’s one way to see it.”

These alternatives communicate boundaries and thoughtfulness.

6. “That’s just how I am.”

This phrase shuts down growth and invites judgment.

What psychology says: Carol Dweck’s research on growth vs. fixed mindsets (Stanford University) shows that people who believe traits like intelligence or behavior are fixed are perceived as less adaptable—and less capable overall. Saying “that’s just how I am” suggests a lack of emotional intelligence and self-reflection.

✅ Say instead: “I’m working on improving that,” or “That’s something I’m trying to get better at.”

These small changes show growth and maturity.

7. “It’s common sense.”

Nothing ends a conversation—or alienates someone—faster.

What psychology says: Studies on conversational narcissism show that using phrases like “it’s just common sense” can signal arrogance and intellectual impatience. It often belittles others’ perspectives, even if unintentionally.

✅ Say instead: “One way to look at it is…” or “Many people see it this way…”

This shifts the tone from superiority to openness, which ironically makes you sound smarter.

8. “I could care less.”

This one’s not just grammatically wrong—it’s confusing.

What psychology says: Incorrect idioms or malapropisms (using the wrong expression in a sentence) are often processed subconsciously as a sign of poor attention to detail. According to research in Psychological Science (2012), even minor grammatical errors can cause a dip in how others rate your intelligence or competence.

✅ Say instead: “I couldn’t care less.” (If you truly mean that.)

Or better yet, say: “That’s not something I’m focused on right now.”

9. “I don’t get it—it’s just stupid.”

Labeling something “stupid” without attempting to understand it reflects poorly on your own reasoning.

What psychology says: According to research on emotional regulation and intellectual humility (Hopkin & Leary, 2011), immediately dismissing ideas as “stupid” shows low tolerance for ambiguity and a lack of curiosity—traits that are associated with cognitive rigidity, not intelligence.

✅ Say instead: “I’m trying to understand the reasoning behind this,” or “This doesn’t make sense to me yet.”

Intelligence is often about how you question—not how quickly you reject.

10. “Whatever happens, happens.”

This might sound Zen, but often it reflects resignation rather than wisdom.

What psychology says: While acceptance can be healthy, passivity in language—especially when it replaces agency—often signals learned helplessness. Martin Seligman’s foundational research on this concept found that people who repeatedly give up control over outcomes are viewed as less capable, even when they’re not.

✅ Say instead: “I’ll do what I can and see where it leads,” or “Let’s see how it unfolds—I’m staying open.”

This language keeps the same calm energy but with a hint of mindful engagement.

Why it matters more than you think

We all use lazy phrases sometimes. They slip out in casual conversations or when we’re tired, frustrated, or trying to be relatable.

But repeated use of these expressions—especially in professional, academic, or emotionally important contexts—can influence how others perceive your intelligence, reliability, and social value.

According to Dr. Mark Murphy, author of Truth at Work, communication habits are like cognitive fingerprints: people will assume things about your IQ, EQ, and even your self-worth based on how you express yourself—whether it’s fair or not.

This doesn’t mean you need to sound like a professor or memorize big words. In fact, true intelligence in conversation is usually marked by clarity, curiosity, emotional regulation, and an ability to adapt your tone to the moment.

A quick self-check: Are you doing this?

Try recording yourself during a casual phone call or meeting. Then play it back and ask:

  • Do I use fillers like “like” or “you know” excessively?

  • Do I preface thoughts with “I’m not sure…” even when I have something valuable to say?

  • Do I use dismissive or overly dramatic language?

  • Do I lean on phrases that shut down rather than invite dialogue?

Even adjusting just one or two of these habits can improve how you’re perceived in both social and professional settings.

Final thoughts

Being perceived as intelligent isn’t about impressing people with complicated language—it’s about speaking clearly, thoughtfully, and with emotional intelligence.

If you catch yourself using these phrases, don’t beat yourself up. Just notice it, and make a shift.

As the psychologist Carl Rogers once said:

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

And sometimes, changing the way you speak is one of the easiest, most powerful ways to change the way the world sees you.

Lachlan Brown

Lachlan Brown is an entrepreneur and co-founder of Brown Brothers Media, a digital publishing network reaching tens of millions of readers monthly. He holds a Graduate Diploma of Psychological Studies from Deakin University, though his real education came afterward: a warehouse job shifting TVs, a stretch of anxiety in his mid-twenties, and the slow discovery that studying the mind is not the same as learning how to live well. He started experimenting with Buddhist principles during breaks at the warehouse and eventually began writing about what he was learning. That writing became Hack Spirit, a widely read personal development site, and his book Hidden Secrets of Buddhism became a bestseller. His work breaks down complex ideas into frameworks people can apply immediately, whether they are navigating a career change, a difficult relationship, or the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it. Lachlan splits his time between Singapore and Saigon. He writes about high-performance routines, decision-making under pressure, digital innovation, and the intersection of Eastern philosophy with modern life. His perspective comes from having built things from scratch, failed at some of them, and learned that clarity comes from practice, not theory.