10 definite signs you’re dealing with a fake nice person

by Lachlan Brown | June 7, 2024, 9:48 pm

Ever met someone who seems super nice, but something just doesn’t feel right?

Trust that gut feeling! Not everyone who smiles is truly friendly.

Here’s a quick rundown on how to spot those who might be pretending a bit too hard.

Let’s dive in!

1. Over-the-Top Compliments

We all enjoy a little flattery now and then, right?

But there’s a difference between genuine praise and excessive buttering up.

If someone is constantly showering you with over-the-top compliments, especially about trivial things, it might be a sign they’re not being entirely sincere.

Genuine compliments come from the heart and feel authentic, while “fake nice” people tend to use them as a tactic to win you over.

So, if you find yourself thinking, “Okay, is my pen choice really that amazing?”—chances are, you’re dealing with someone who’s laying it on thick.

2. They’re All Ears… But Only When Others Are Watching

Ever noticed someone who’s super attentive to you in a group setting but barely gives you the time of day in private?

Beware of this chameleon act. People genuinely interested in what you have to say will listen whether there’s an audience or not.

Fake nice” individuals often play up their attentive side when they know it’ll earn them social points.

But when there’s no one around to impress?

Suddenly, your stories and concerns might not seem so captivating to them.

Trust your gut: a truly kind person values your words, not the potential audience they might bring.

3. They Never Disagree… About Anything

At first glance, someone who never disagrees with you might seem like a dream come true.

“Finally, someone who gets me completely!” you might think.

But wait a minute. Is it realistically possible for two individuals to see eye-to-eye on everything?

A “fake nice” person often avoids disagreements not because they genuinely align with your every thought, but because they want to avoid potential conflict or keep up appearances.

Someone who’s genuine will constructively challenge your views now and then because they care about true connection and growth.

Remember: real friends aren’t “yes-men.” They’re the ones who aren’t afraid to lovingly call you out and engage in meaningful debates.

4. Their Stories Keep Changing

Ever heard the saying, “It’s hard to keep track of lies”?

A classic sign of a “fake nice” person is inconsistency in their narratives.

Today, they might mention how they’re allergic to cats, but next week they reminisce about their childhood pet cat named Whiskers.

Genuine people are consistent because they share their true experiences and feelings.

If you start to notice that the tales they tell seem to shift with the wind, it might be a red flag that they’re molding their stories to fit the moment, rather than being honest with you.

5. They Have a Surprising Number of “Ex-Best Friends”

Did you know that, according to psychologists, the average person can maintain only about 5 close relationships at a time?

Yet, if you encounter someone who constantly talks about their countless “ex-best friends,” it’s time to raise an eyebrow.

While it’s natural for friendships to evolve or end over time, a never-ending list of past close companions might indicate that this person struggles to maintain genuine, long-term relationships.

It’s essential to ask: Why did so many supposedly deep bonds end? Are they the common denominator in these failed connections?

6. They’re Quick to Share Others’ Secrets

Ever been in a casual conversation and suddenly you’re hit with, “Don’t tell anyone, but…”?

A genuine person values trust and understands the importance of confidentiality, especially when friends confide in them.

If someone is quick to spill the beans about others, there’s a good chance they might be doing the same with your secrets.

Sharing confidential information not only breaks trust but can also be a tactic to gain attention or favor.

Remember, if they’re gossiping to you, they’re probably gossiping about you.

7. Their Kindness Comes with Strings Attached

Real kindness is given freely, without expecting something in return.

But with a “fake nice” person, there’s often a hidden cost to their generosity.

Perhaps they offered to help you move, but now they constantly remind you of that favor whenever they need something.

Or maybe they bought you a gift and later held it over your head during an argument.

Genuine people help because they want to, not because they’re setting up a future debt.

If every act of kindness feels like a transaction, it might be time to reevaluate the authenticity of the relationship.

8. Their Empathy Feels Forced

Empathy – the ability to understand and share the feelings of another – is a natural human trait.

But with “fake nice” individuals, their attempts at empathy often feel staged or insincere.

You might share a personal story or hardship, only to find their response feels rehearsed or detached, like they’re reciting a line from a script rather than genuinely connecting with your emotions.

While it’s true that not everyone is great at expressing empathy, there’s a difference between someone struggling to find the right words and someone who’s simply putting on a performance.

9. They’re Almost Too Perfect

Now, this might sound a bit odd at first, but bear with me. Everyone has flaws—it’s a fundamental part of being human.

If you meet someone who seems to have the perfect response, the perfect outfit, the perfect story for every occasion, and never a hair out of place, it might be worth a second thought.

Authentic people make mistakes, have awkward moments, and occasionally put their foot in their mouth.

They’re relatable because they’re real.

A “fake nice” person, on the other hand, might obsessively curate their image to avoid appearing vulnerable or imperfect.

Life isn’t a perfectly scripted movie, and if someone feels like a character too good to be true, they just might be.

10. They Fade Away During Tough Times

Life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. We all face challenges, and during those tough times, true friends stand by our side.

However, a “fake nice” person might be conspicuously absent when the going gets rough.

While they’re front and center during the good times, parties, and celebrations, they seem to vanish when you need a shoulder to lean on or a helping hand.

Authentic people show up, even when it’s inconvenient or there’s nothing in it for them.

If someone is only around during the sunny days and disappears during the storms, it’s a telling sign of where their intentions truly lie.

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